Welcome to my endless enigma of pointless verbal ironies and useless information revolving around the existence of me, Itsu. Yes, I welcome you to Infinity. If you're scared, you needn't worry, I won't bite unless provoked otherwise...usually. Now enjoy your slow downward spiral toward the very core of my innermost being, well the psychotic section anyway.
Have fun.
if you'd like, my darlings, check me out at one of my other existences:
[Happy endings don't exist because the world keeps turning--
but you don't have to have an ending--
to be happy.]
[~We are all a little weird and
Life’s a little weird,
And when we find someone whose
Weirdness is compatible with ours,
We join up with them and fall in
Mutual weirdness and call it Love~
~Dr. Seuss~]
you can completely ignore those minecraft vid links, that series is over...it was terrible and didn't go over well to begin with XP
my merokins got a new, better, bigger computer and we are getting a new server from a different host *nod* one that is widely known among the minecraft community and from the looks of it is the only one which has mods/plugins available... and we terribly need the teleport mod T_T mero keeps running off and getting lost and/or dying and respawning in the middle of nowhere and we spend most of our time trying to find eachother rather than being able to record, and by the time we do something happens with her computer and i have to leave as the server is hers, and upon returning all we had done is partially not saved..... -___- so.freakin.annoying.
SO, we shall be having a new series soon, with much better quality--we hope--
it shall have a fun and eccentric texture pack, and a few mods i should think yes *nodnod*
therefore, my minions, if you are minecraft obsessed as i, your leader and master, then you should check it out...whenever it occurs..AND when it does, i shall of course inform you as i have nothing else better to do o 3o
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in other, not as shiny news, i still have not yet scanned anything in AND have not been drawing much as it is...instead i have been minecrafting like the dork i am X3
i know i need to scan and lick the paper with my pencil, but i am such a moron, you know that things will continue to be generally slow...
BUT, i have been writing more than usual, nothing of the stories which i posted here and those shan't be restarted and rewritten and worked until much later yes, but fanfic related things will hopefully begin shaping and similarly, whenever those are begun online i shall tell all of ye faithful ones *pats affectionately*
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and now i frollic off, to continue with my ritualistic site checking, and hopefully after that mero will have gotten the server made, uncertainties, it is more difficult to do than the one we already made *strokes chin sagacously--I CAN MAKE UP WORDS, DO NOT QUESTION ME*
perhaps shall draw some tonight...may likely write, as i must awaken earlier than usual..hmm hmmmm *wanders off*
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okay, i give in, here is something awesome, cat, and window related...how i spoiler you T 3T
greetings minions! i can tell you missed my lucious voice of words.
i have gone ahead and decided to put up that second muro dump of gaia chibi things, as that last one i just never got around to making since i got busy and utterly lost all interest in trying to make more..they hurt my finger and take forever to create and simply seemed to get worse as i went on XP
go ahead and mozey on over, check out them crappy things and marvel in what my finger can accomplish..MARVEL I SAY! D:< are you marveling? good, good.
well, that is all i have right now, still haven't quite finished my classes so not going to hook up my new scanner and so get that huge hoard of finished works put up here yet. but fear not my lovelies, i shall alert you when i do so *pets*
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a bit about what all i have been up to, because i have no one else to talk to other than you all imaginary creatures...
besides procrasting a ton, i did finish one class and have just some math left to do, but i shall be done by the 9th and so will finish setting up my shiny new scanner that i got for christmas
a little sadness, a few days ago my computer decided to kamikaze and leave me for about a week while i had to await the installation of a completely new harddrive...meaning i lost all i had on my laptop at the time ; n ;
but fear not, luckily i had not yet put all my stuff back on from the last time i had to take it in to be fixed so i lost very little, and much of which i had somewhere else and could be scavenged. with this new drive i decided to go ahead and restore most of my files and get around to some of that organization i was planning *nod* i have completed the two image files i had intened to do and right now i don't think there was any others i planned to do that with but i do have many many things i am going to go ahead and get rid of as i will never use them. a crap ton of avatars from numerous series that i would never use an avatar from--oh yeah, i was going to organize some of those folders..shoot..more to do......anyways!
some more interesting things, or i suppose at least more interesting than my OCD habits with my laptop files, i have been doodling like crazy, filling up my little sketchbook with things not to mentioned adding more to my WIP and finished stacks...which is really just making the task of getting it all scanned in and put up places a much longer process..but who cares! you do? well your opinion doesnt matter, i am the lord and master here, not sit down and massage my feet ...yes..that's good....
i have also lately become rather obsessed with watching minecraft videos on youtube..it is just so fun to watch! and if it weren't a computer game i would enjoy trying my hand at it...however i dislike all those button combinations and whatnot with the keyboard..bleh XP
i should be doing math right now...but i don't wanna....T 3T.....
i have actually not been able to do much of anything on the internet or my laptop for several weeks now, and with these issues i had always believed i couldn't post here--pretty much anywhere else really T 3T--because of the wayward nature of links and what will or won't load, etc...some things work other don't..it's a mess of ire inducing uncertainties and i wish i knew why the hell it was happening...but it looks like tomorrow i will be finally taking it in! :D EDIT: Well, i took it in to the geek squad, he looked through things, changed one thing or two and put on something meant to help analyze my computer content, not the hardware, to be clear. Aaaaaaaand after doing that and deleting a few unnecessary and possibly hindering things, then running the analyzer and it found nothing. Not a freakin, damn thing. There is one item i have not been able to delete and i think may be causing at least some of the issues and that is McAfee. I don't know if it is corrupted or the actual macfee site or whatever is screwed up or what, but it won't load or uninstall because it freezes the program. Just another stupid problem that has come to join the haunting of the technological existence of me. Sigh..sigh. I personally still maintain the theory that my harddrive is the issue, somehow, someway..yes. It needs to be taken in again where perhaps they can remove the unresponsive McAfee, see if that does ANYTHING to assist, and if not i want them to check out the hardware...cause this is pissing me off more. I already missed the jack hunting zOMG event on gaia and it looks like i will miss the opening of the new area, DMS, also in zOMG, plus i have missed SO MANY DAYS of gold earning possibilities!!! I NEED TO REGAIN GOLD FROM PURCHASED CURRENT DREAM AVIE ITEMS D:< Yes, i enjoy this virtual world. If you have a life then go be apart of it, cause i don't and this is what sustains my restless pointlessness of not having one. Yeah, i don't have a life and never have. Really makes the reason i get the amount of view i do here seem rather strange. All i do is ramble about crap, and if not that then it is general updates of things i finally get around to posting here. ...i am going to shut up now, just wanted to update, you people weird enough to come here. Probably only lost souls catching a tag thinking it will lead to something of meaning when in fact it is asinine babble. *pop* ..yup.
Living without internet or my computer abilities at all(since i backed up my things, i couldn't go saving or starting new documents to in my folders) sooo..quite sadness indeed. i have been necessarily forced into get my large reading pile out of the way, though. Not that i dislike reading--i quite enjoy it--, i just take forever to around to it--or anything--, but when i do i get through things fast. Two books complete, some writing, and some art...knocking down a few of those pillars which needed and still need to be brutally attacked. However i must say going back to long hand writing, for extended periods of time, is painful XP it has been close to three years since i have done such...i am a bit better now but still *cracks wrists and fingers*
i really don't think this going is to go through, but if it does, then this all is why i haven't been posting or faving or thumbs uping, though i have been able to view things, so points still to people there *nod* and you had best enjoy those points people....you.had.best. T 3T
i wrote a much longer and more explanitory post on this for my deviantART, which then, of course, didn't go through. But i had spent so much time on it that i did the annoying process of transfering it a word doc, saving it, moving it to a flashdrive, going to the desktop downstairs, logging in there, and getting it all set and posting through that. ...as you may have noticed, using the desktop i prefer not--if you haven't, then watch this mysterious red light that is moving swiftly on the wall *moves around laser pointer*--. It is rather dark in that room due burnt out bulbs--forever out it seems-- and while i like darkness, it isn't good for the eyes. Especially since our desktop is a fairly big screen, as it is a media type computer...so bright, large screen you sit close to in a relatively darkened room for hours on end...yeah... Though due to all this laptop chaos, i do occasionally pop on there to check certain things on certain sites, but only briefly.
soooooooooooo, if this doesn't go through, then....you'll all live. probably.
EDIT:hey! it actually went through...who would have thought..sigh...the strangeness of this issue is frustrating indeed. >:/
okay, i got the last of the scanned in bunch i did a little while back put up for eyeballs. they are just two rough sketches, but i always really liked them :3
then, i have a bunch of finished works waiting in my binder and an even larger amounts of WIPS that i am trying like hell not to add to eventhough my brain feels like it's full to the brim with ideas x_x HOWEVAH! part of the reason for the withholding was because my sketch book which had to be mutilated, as it was falling apart and the pages organized in a nice binder, and only had about six pages left after some erasing of never to be finished messes, which is now down to...four maybe...so i couldn't let myself do stuff incase something came up! ...yes...a drawing emergency T 3T ..it could happen. But, this evening, after a breakfast dinner at IHOP, we went and replenished my sketch pad stock! i know have two more replacements, as well as a larger horizontal drawing pad for bigger things! i don't know how on earth i will get any drawings from that online as it is almost twice as big as my scanner. -___- but, i will figure something out...even if i have to use magic and a phone camera. excited for it really, because i have some large scale drawing ideas in mind that i couldn't fit on my usual sketch pad page.
in better news, wait..i didn't give bad news. okay, hold on. *digs through enormous folder of life crap* alright then, so my laptop is ill. my guess is that it's terminal, longterm though at least, so i have time to revive it's health. from all the errors i get, all the time, i am betting now that it is indeed a hardrive problem rather than some sort of virus. i mean, your computer driver should not sound like it's puttering...like a little ball that came loose on a circlular, rotating thing with grooves that it bounces on. and according to the very few things i could find online in reference to my specific errors, they are ones that can lead to the evils of blue screens, random shut downs, etc. all things i am familiar with from my last laptop that killed itself as well. i seem to have some horrid technological curse upon me T_T all my stuff keeps screwing itself over.DX i am going to have to back up all my crap..AGAIN..so we can take it in, since it is very likely a wipe or new hardrive or something will have to be done/installed.
NOW, in better news, i have lost some weight!! FINALLY...it's not much really, but it's some and that makes me feel better because for once something turns out the way it should...it's is still, only a small amount, more noticable in my legs because of my bike riding and not my stomach so much which is where i prefer to get rid of T 3T stupid little belly pouch of evil. sooooooooooooo, yeah.
Something for your eye gouging pleasure...a long and annoying update on my life and what is going to happen in the near and distant future *nod*
SIGH, well took me a while to get around to writing this(and then to get it up here XP)…been very busy, or at least for me it is…I mean I have moved more than I would in two months in the last three weeks! It’s been very hard on me I think T –T i mean yesterday i slept through the entire day from 4 am to 5 am the next day! i slept through two very annoying alarms! it was my body taking matters into it's own hands i think T 3T sometimes it does that...my body and mind are definately two entities...
Anyways, the simple of it is, I have been trying to come back to life lately. I sort of imagine myself as having been dead my entire life and now I have started digging my way to the surface, to live among the humans, masquerading as one in order to have a “normal” existence.
I really took my dog’s death as a (I apologize how cliché this may sound to some people) sign from God. It was something I always knew would happen and anticipated in the last few weeks of her life, but I suppose the suddenness of it all and then learning it was the same cancer that had taken my grandma when she was still so young (only just turned 69!)…it was a wake-up call that I knew I needed but had never truly felt. That life is unexpected, no matter how fully I live by ‘expect the unexpected’, I can’t avoid that things happen whether you want them or not, and even if you were knowing that it was on its way the full force of it knocks some of your brain loose again. I loved my dog greatly, and I adored my grandmother. Even though I have always had problems, and I know I always will, and while I can empathize with wished to simply end it all, there is this small biting fire inside me that wants to live. I want to go to college, I want to find something I love to do, I want to find my someone, I want to have children and make my parents grandparents—they would be great ones too!—, I want pets of my own, a home of my own, I want to grow old hand in hand with my love, and I want to live a long life with purpose, then slip soundly into heaven, and meet everyone I loved and lost and the reason for my being ‘face’ to ‘face’. I have hopes in life, and I never once believed I couldn’t one day have those. Having this loss really reminded me, as much as I can take my time to be ready, I also need to keep myself moving, or else all these experiences will fall into the abyss I can’t seem to climb out of.
All this kicking got me to know I need to be thinking about college, sure it won’t be where I’m going tomorrow or this school year but it should be soon and I am going to need to work hard to be ready. I have things I need to accomplish before I can do that, and I want to be able to get to that first day…with a dorm and strange roommate and everything—eventhough I’m sure I won’t be too fond of having a roommate -___- —and know that I made it and be proud of myself for once. With this going on now, I don’t know how much I will be able to be around…and it truly saddens me, but until I can find my footing in this new life of mine, I just can’t be wasting and procrastinating (as I am quite skilled in). I will always try to make time for my friends and I will always be lurking every now and then even if I don’t make myself present :’)
Onto some fun stuff! I think I finally tacked down a major after all the depressing uncertainty I had when wishing for a career in Vet Tech areas, I will still try and study some Pre-Vet though even if I don’t major because I love it still and who knows what will come along in life ^_^ I have chosen something I always knew I liked and thought about but simply wasn’t sure of, and that is Majoring in Psychology. Seems appropriate, right? It’s kind of been my whole life really XP Then I would like to Minor in Writing. Not because I intend to have a writing career but I would love to one day publish some of my original fiction ideas and stories. It’s all writer’s dreams to have their own work in a nice, brand new book smelling, hard back novel. To do this, I need to know the ACTUAL rules of writing which I now do not really abide by so learning would be a great help regardless! As I said I will surely try and look into some pre-vet education but I won’t do anything career wise with it
I already have a college picked out too! One I loved from the first time I toured, and the other day I got back from an overnight tour thing which only made me seal the deal permanently! Especially my talk with a very kind and understand admissions counselor who helped me figure out what to do in order to be ready to apply ^-^ it’s wonderful to have a plan now and a real goal to be heading for *nodnod*
So hopefully, I will be a student of the class year 2013 along with my sister and second best friend! Sure, it will be the year that my graduating class will be starting their junior years but I wasn’t ready then plus it’s not like I’m advancing with them all and staying behind...it will be a new world full of new people and I will have my sibling and friend there with me too :3 so I’m not worried, I’m hopeful.
My life checklist currently:
-Finally get my 2nd semester of geometry finished
-Subsequently, getting my high school diploma (yes, I did graduate but I have this one semester I failed and while I can just not do it and get my GED, I am not letting a little bit of math keep me from a college prep diploma when I had more credits than necessary for the honors…I will not. T 3T)
-Get my driver’s ed. Permit
-Get my license
-Get a job(maaaaaaaaybe)
-Study and prepare for the SAT/ACT
-Take and kick the butts of SAT/ACT
-(if SAT/ACT required then will do after if not then during) take around 24 hours of community college to get a new GPA to rule out my horrid high school one and show the college I CAN work despite my issues before weighing me down
-Apply to college!
-GET IN! (would be AWESOME bonus to be eligible for an academic scholarship!..but that is unlikely T-T)
-Start my 6 year work towards my future!
So that is going to be my life until that school year of 2013! Pray for me those that pray and wish well those that don’t…it’s going to be a long road and I’m still just starting
All that aside, I have a few drawings that I scanned in a couple days ago that I shall start slipping in! none of it is anything big, all sketchy, and then gaia avie art for people..on gaia, obviously
