"Land. We reached land!!!" Hachi said as he kissed the ground. He was in a transformation accident. Misa was still sobbing.
"Now what?" Kaku said as he flicked his hair. The only one not here is our favorite funky tanuki, "And where's Shukaku?"
"Must get CD before everyone hears it..." Kyuubi muttered as he went on the opposite direction. Houkou, Hachi, and Neka went to find Shukaku. Poor Kaku was with Misa.
(Time Square)
"Wow the streets are crowded," Neka said uneasily.
"Hope he isn't drunk..." Houkou said, "If he loses his mind, not only would he turn back into demon, but he'll be more worse than Misa."
Just then a familiar voice was heard.
"Hey baby. Do ya have *hic* a map? Cuz' I get lost in your eyes."
"There he isss." Hachi yelled as he went inside the pub.
"Hey snakey. Come and give meh some Sake." Shukaku hiccuped. Hachi was furious.
"DON'T CALL ME SSSNAKEY!!!" Hachi yelled and tackled the drunken tanuki. He then was beaten up and very ill.
"Your turn." Hachi said to Houkou, then fainted.
"Okay. I'M the only one who can save him." Neka announced, "Oh Shukaku-Kun!"
"Whoa Neka. I think heaven's lost an angel." Shukaku grinned evilly.
"Oh really?" Neka said. She hit Shukaku with a frying pan.
"I seem to lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?" Shukaku said as he fainted.
(Back at the docks)
Kaku was a little worried at first. Then he had an idea.
"What do you wanna do, Misa?"
"Can we go to the big Toys R Us?" Misa asked.
"Sure."
"Yay!"
(Toys R Us)
"She'd be probably be at the ferris wheel or the Barbie dollhouse." Kaku thought to himself.
"Cool Videogames!" Misa yelped as she held a controller. Kaku sighed and went to the Naruto section to get Misa a gift.
(Ferris Wheel)
"Why do ya like Kyuubi so much?" Kaku asked Misa, wondering why a cute demon would and someone as cold as Kyuubi.
"Well, He's smart, cool, serious, and very strong." Misa quietly said, "He doesn't go drooling and all pervy when it comes to girls."
"I have a present for you." Kaku gave Misa a Nine-Tailed Naruto doll. Misa cried.
"It's okay. I'm here for you." Kaku cooed as he hugged Misa.
"You are so kind to me," Misa hiccuped, "Thank you Kaku-kun!"
"You're welcome."
"Now where is Kyu-Kun?"
~Shukaku
"We are now on the plane," Nekomata said, "What now?"
"Uuhhhh! Since we're in first-class, how about a movie?" Houkou barked.
"Wally!" Misa said eating popcorn. Everyone agreed. During the movie, Kaku whispered to Shukaku.
"Does Wally and Eve remind you of someone..." Kaku chuckled. Shukaku looked at Kyuubi and Misa, Kyuubi giving him a death glare.
"Uh guyssss?" Hachimata stuttered, "I did something..."
"What did you do!?!" Kyuubi yelled. First Shukaku, now this.
"Welll you know I sssssuck at transformations. So I went to the pilots to ask when are we gonna land. The pilots ssssaw a human with three heads, then they jumped out of the plane. Ssssooo we are gonna crash into the ocean."
Instantly, Kyuubi and Houkou raced to the cockpit.
"How do you drive this thing!?!" Houkou asked. Kyuubi pressed buttons randomly accidently pressed the Auto-Pilot button off. Kaku had an idea.
"I'll transform the boat with Misa's help," Kaku said as he got some clay out, "Henge!"
The plane turned into a boat with sailors, wine, and other stuff. Kyuubi wanted to kill both Shukaku and Hachimata now but was cut off with the boys singing.
Boys:So if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together, just to sing we love you
And if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together just for you
Hachimata started sing with Hawaii style clothing.
Hachi:Racing all around the seven seas
Chasing all the girls and making robberies
'Causing panic everywhere we go
Party-hardy on Titanic
Shukaku, who was drunk, was drinking the biggest Sake and bumping Houkou and Kyuubi into the water.
Shukaku:Sailing, sailing, jumping off the railing
Drinking, drinking, 'till the ship is sinking
Gambling, stealing, lots of sex-appealing
Misa:Come, let us sing the sailor-song
"Must..kill...SHUKAKU!!!" Kyuubi yelled as he rode Houkou onto the boat.
Boys:So if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together, just to sing we love you
And if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together just for you
Misa then grabbed Kyuubi by the neck.
"I thought you were not going to bother me!" Kyuubi said.
"Big brother said plane," Misa smiled evilly, "He didn't say boat>"
Misa:Sailorman, you really turn me on
Now the guys are gone, come let us get it on
Girls like me are pretty hard to find
So if you go, I'll kick your Heiney
Kaku:Sailing, sailing, jumping off the railing
Drinking, drinking, 'till the ship is sinking
Gambling, stealing, lots of sex-appealing
Neka:Come, let us sing the sailor-song
Boys:So if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together, just to sing we love you
And if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together just for you
Kyuubi, out of Misa claws, grabbed a kunai and headed for Shukaku.
Kyuubi:Now, let's fight!
Shukaku:Ha, that's not a knife, this is a knife!
Shukaku takes out a katana. Kyuubi and Shukaku fought until there were all tired.
Houkou:Sailing, sailing, jumping off the railing
Drinking, drinking, 'till the ship is sinking
Gambling, stealing, lots of sex-appealing
Hachi:Come, let us sing the sailor-song
Boys:So if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together, just to sing we love you
And if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together just for you
Shukaku:I'm king of the world!
Misa:Wow, this was great!
Shukaku:Yeah, baby, you can sail my ship!
All:And if we all come together, we know what to do
We all come together just for you
"This is turning out to be the best vacation ever!" Neka-chan said. Kyuubi groaned.
To be continued...
Sokou's family camping Trip
August 1997
A campfire was brewing as a rooster sat beside it.
Rooster:*sips cofee* Ahh! There's nothing like the peace and quiet of the Great Outdoors.
Sokou:-runs and bumps his dad-Wahhh! Wahhh! Get it off!!!!
Rooster:How about you can be a man and go get some more firewood. There's nothing to be afraid of.
(deep part of forest)
Sokou:There's nothing to be afraid of...*picks up sticks*
Growl!
Sokou:AAAhhhh!*runs and falls into something*What a stupid place to put a hole!
The hole was really footprints. Growls, a srceam in the night, and the video stops there.
Me:What did Sokou see? Could it be the creature known as bigfoot? Today on Mysterious Phenomena of the Unexplained we'll find out.
Voice:MYSTERIOUS PHENOMENA OF THE UNEXPLAINED!!!!
Me:*looks at book*Bigfoot, sometimes called sasquatch AKA Gigantopithecus, the Florida Skunk ape, and My 5 tailed friend Houkou.
Houkou:*sticks his tounge out and gives a thumbs up as he moves the camara*
Me:But does it really exist?
An orange-green haired man and a blue haired man sits on a now dead tree stump.
Sokou and Kaku
Present day
Sokou:I really did see a Sasquatch.
Growl! Snarl!
Hachimata:*points*That's him!
Me:*off screen*This is Hachimata, Bigfoot expert. We have offered him $10,000 to bring back conclusive evidence of the creatures existence.
Hachimata:You wait here while I go flush him out*runs into cave*
The growling was only a radio. Hachi-san turned it off, then put on a bigfoot suit.
Hachi:All I need to do is let them take my picture and leave a few footprints.
Growl!
Hachi:I thought I turned that darn thing off!
Snarl!
Hachi:*looks up, turns white, and screams like a girl*
Growl!
Sokou:That sounded close.
AAahhhhhhhh!
Kaku:There's two of them.
Hachi pops up from nowhere. Sokou hides.
Kaku:Bigfoot has eaten Hachimata!*runs*
Hachi:Hold on! Come back!
Me:*holds pic of Hachi in Bigfoot suit*Faked photographs like these are a dime a dozen. Until someone actually captures one of these elusive creatures, Bigfoot would remain a
MYSTERIOUS PHENOMENA OF THE UNEXPLAINED!!!
Houkou:*turns camara towards me*
Me:*chuckles*To think some people believe this hairy freak actually exists.
Bigfoot:GROWLLL!
Me:Uh oh. No stay back. AAAAAHHHHHH! Not the face, not face. Oww, my tail. wwwwwahhhhh!
~Shukaku
"We are gonna go to New York!" Kyuubi stated. Everyone cheered. Suddenly, the door bell rang. A man who looked like Deidara, but with blue hair entered.
"Where have you been Kaku?" Neka meowed.
"I have to get more clay on the trip," Kaku answered, "So I went where there was more..."
(Meanwhile in Akatsuki base)
"Let's go Deidara." Pein said to the blonde man.
"Yeah Sempai. We're going to Hong Kong!" Tobi yelled excitedly.
"Just let me get my-" Deidara suddenly saw that his clay was gone, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
(Back to Club)
"As I was saying," Kaku rolled his eyes as he thought about the fans that might kill him, "How are we going there? We don't have plane tickets."
"Luckily," Shukaku said as he held a box load of tickets, "I'm prepared."
"How did you get those!?!" Everyone asked.
"I gave an american producer a CD of Kyuubi singing..." Shukaku whimpered, then covered his ears.
"YOU WHAT!?!" Kyuubi yelled.
(America)
The producer guy put a CD in the CD player. Music was heard.
Kyuubi:It starts with
One thing, I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It’s so unreal
Didn’t look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on, but didn’t even know
Wasted it all just to
Watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me, will eventually, be a memory, of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
One thing, I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I’m surprised it got so far
Things aren’t the way they were before
You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end
You kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me, will eventually, be a memory, of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter!
"This guy is great!" The producer said, "Let him and his pals come here as a token of my friendship."
To be continued...
Here is some more info. It's about Nekomata and I:
Name:Shukaku Ichibi
Jinchuuriki: Sabaku no Gaara (extracted)
Tale in the Legend of the Tailed Beasts: Shukaku is a bijuu in the form of Raccon Dog (Tanuki of the Japanese mythology). Before, he was a priest that lived in the Desert of Nara. Because of the dark power released by Yamata no Orochi, and under the heavy assault of wind and sand, he transformed into a racoon dog (His actual form). He has a playful and extravagant personality, resembling the Tanuki nature. Has a pretty active sexual life. Shukaku lives in the souls of people killed by the wind and sand. The violet (blue in the anime) tatoos represent his title of God of Wind. in Naruto the Shukaku was sealed inside Gaara but then extracted by Deidara from Akatsuki.
Situation in the Ancient War of the 9 Gods: Battled 5 times; 1 Win, 3 Losses, 1 Flee
Wins: Sokou
Losses: Raijuu, Nekomata, Isonade
Escapes: Yamata no Orochi
Fate: Shukaku is defeated by a Nara Monk called Oraga Nakashimu with a type of magic art. Then, the monk proceeds to use the "Tool of Power: Antler Teakettle" to seal it into the seal in the Wind Shrine.
Japanese Myth Appearance: A species of Tanuki, Yellow body
Ability: Sandstorms, has the control of Wind and Sand manipulation.
Bijuu Strength Ranking: 8th
Bijuu Chakra/Stamina Ranking: 9th
Symbolic Element: Wind (God of Wind)
Origin / Discovered in: Nara Desert
Tanuki in folklore:
The current humorous image of tanuki is thought to have been developed during the Kamakura era. The wild tanuki has unusually large testicles, a feature often comically exaggerated in artistic depictions of tanuki. Tanuki may be shown with their testicles flung over their backs like a traveller's pack, or using them as drums. Tanuki are also typically depicted as having large bellies. They may be shown drumming on their bellies instead of their testicles, especially in children's art. Other stories report tanuki as being harmless and productive members of society. Several shrines have stories of past priests who were tanuki in disguise. A popular tale known as Bunbuku chagama is about a tanuki who fooled a monk by transforming into a tea-kettle. Another is about a tanuki who tricked a hunter by disguising his arms as tree boughs, until he spread both arms at the same time and fell off the tree. Tanuki are said to cheat merchants with leaves they have magically disguised as paper money. Some stories describe tanuki as using leaves as part of their own shape-shifting magic.
Statues of tanuki can be found outside many Japanese temples and restaurants, especially noodle shops. These statues often wear a big, cone-shaped hat and carry a bottle of sake. Shukaku itself means "drinker" thus it really fits with tanuki image. Tanuki statues always have a large belly, although contemporary sculptures may or may not show the traditional large testicles. These exaggerated features represent fertility and plenty.
Name:Nekomata Nibi
Jinchuuriki: Yugito (extracted)
Tale in the Legend of the Tailed Beasts: Nekomata is a bijuu in the form of cat, and possesses the power of death. This Bijuu lives in a place called “Forest of Death” (Not a mistranslation.) in Hokkaido, to the north. Her appearance is a black cat monster (depicted with huge, black angel wings). She’s the Death God’s pet. Nekomata feeds on dead people’s spirits, and can summon these to fight for her. She uses a third eye at the top of its head to consume the spirits. in Naruto, the Nekomata was sealed in a body of a kunoichi from Kumogakure named Yugito and it was extracted by 2 Akatsuki Members, Hidan and Kakuzu.
Situation in the Ancient War of the 9 Gods: Trying to dominate her enemies, Nekomata forms an alliance with Houkou, and attacks Kyuubi. They have a disastrous defeat, and Nekomata is rescued by the Death God, escaping death by a hair’s breadth. Battled 3 times; 2 Wins, 1 Loss.
Wins: Kaku, Isonade
Losses: Kyuubi
Fate: Nekomata ends up killed by Kyuubi later, and in that instant her spirit is summoned by the Death God. The body was kept in a shrine in the Forest of Death, sealed by the Death God himself.
Japanese Myth Appearance: A species of two tails black cat, with slightly more pointed ears and bigger canines.
Ability: Death; may control deceased person's spirits (May be related to Gaara) as well as different dark beasts
Bijuu Strength Ranking: 4th
Bijuu Chakra/Stamina Ranking: 8th
Symbolic Element: Darkness (God of Darkness)
Origin / Discovered in: Hokkaido’s “Forest of Devils” (Different of Forest of Death)
More info about Nekomata:
it is said it can walk erect. The original Bijuu was a old cat, depicted as a fat, old lady’s image also. People knew of it, and in fear of having their cats turned into the monster, they cut its tails to prevent the transformation when the time came – a bifurcation. By gesturing with its tail (and walking erect), Nekomata can animate and control the dead to do their bidding, or even dance for their amusement. Sometimes it eats its owner, then changes into an human appearance, waiting for a next opportunity. Nekomata eats the person it hates, but if the person is even more wicked, the crueler the cat becomes. When it sees the person, Nekomata won’t differ the bad and good anymore, and injures the person as much as it can. There is also a good Nekomata in the legend, that often turns into a young girl’s appearance to approach the society; with a very docile nature, likes eating fish, has a beautiful body and likes depending upon others. Otherwise, the Nekomata’s appearance becomes of a old woman, that displays bad habits in public and always has an air of dread around her; which if around people for an extended period can cause disease and pestilence.
Nekomata can also do other magic, but their most well-known and common power is that of animating the dead and manipulating them to whatever ends the particular Nekomata wishes. A Nekomata must be appeased by attention, food, and respect, and while many are fickle and turn their attention at a moment's notice, they do not tend to forget when they are insulted and by whom, holding grudges. To gain revenge, these nekomata usually controlled the tormentors' dead relatives, haunting them until the Nekomata was appeased with food, apologies and attention
Okayyyyyy.....Kyuubi killed Neka-chan!?!
Wow. Crazy things happen when you reserch on the internet.
~Shukaku
