Name: Nikki
Age: 27
DOB: Nov. 24 1986
Height: 5ft roughly - What? I'm short
Believe in Love at First Sight: No.
Relationship Status: Single / Don't care
Here lately, I've come to discover, it doesn't matter whether I get married or not. It doesn't even matter if I stay single. Thing is, I may or may not be ready for it. What's important is being content with what you have.
I have a lot of favorite anime, but a few of them include: Code Geass, Trigun, Fullmetal Alchemist and Fairy Tail.
Favorite music: rock / hard rock / heavy metal, pop - I like things that people have said doesn't fit me.
My all time favorite band is the old Guns N' Roses. The new one sucked. End of story.

These Conversations and Dreams Dafuq?

Just like the title says, do you ever have those dreams and conversations with friends that just leave you saying, "Dafuq?" Yeah, I'm pretty sure today was one of those days. If someone had've been inside my head or accidentally picked up my phone and read the texts between me and one of my friends, that's exactly the question they'd ask themselves. Honestly I don't have a clue what brought on either the dream or the conversation, but I can't say I didn't enjoy either. :p Just keep this in mind. If you enter my mind or accidentally pick up my phone, I'm a freak. That's all you need to know. Perhaps I'm a clean freak, but I'm a freak nonetheless. "I don't speak your languagono" and I come from a different planet.

I Do Not Deserve My Friends

After the events of the day, which in no way do I intend to go into detail about them here, I have come to realize just how special my friends are, and how undeserving I am of them. I don't understand why they're willing to talk to each other for me, but I know that I do not deserve it. I can not say I'm sorry or thank you enough to them. I really, truly love my friends, and I bring so much trouble on myself, it's a wonder people don't disown me as a friend. I have been disowned by a friend, but I brought that on myself too. If my emotions could be held in check and I didn't over react to everything, I might not wind up begging and pleading for mercy all the time. Unfortunately, it is my heart that gets me hurt. To all those I call friend or that still see fit to call me a friend, just know you are very important to me, and without you, my life would be nothing. I owe you all my life.

I Am Who I Am

I am sick and tired of trying to please everybody. People judge me from the sideline but they have no idea what it's like to be me. How can you sit there passing judgement on me when you know nothing about me? Seriously, from now on, if you don't like me, you can just get over it. Am I perfect? No, and I don't claim to be, but I am sick and tired of the world telling me how I should be. I am myself, and I don't care whether you like it or not. If you can't accept me for who I am, then you don't accept me.

LOL Knights Would Not Have Shining Armor

After reading a post on facebook which I've shared, I've realized something. All these times I've mentioned knights in shining armor or I've heard them mentioned in stories where they rescue the princess are not true. See, a knight that rescues the princess from her dragon guarded castle or whatever the situation may be is not going to be a knight in shining armor. Nope... instead, he'd be a knight in tattered, worn and rusty armor. See, a brave knight would be in bad shape and would not look nearly as good as stories depict. The funny part is, I didn't think about this until after reading said post. Chances are, he would not be riding a white steed either, or if he was, he wouldn't be white for long. When you think about it, if you were a princess being rescued, would you be more grateful for the man in shining armor atop a white stead, or a man who shows up bloody, scarred, rusty armor and blood all over his sword who kneels at the bedside of his princess still in pain? Most likely, you'd rather be rescued and you'd show more gratitude to the knight I just mentioned. Worth thinking about.

Making My Own Decisions? T'is Hard.

Have you ever had one of those moments where you see an answer staring you in the face, but you know it's just too hard, or at least it seems hard to you? That is my dilemma. I was told I need to make more of my own decisions. I can't just do that. See, first of all, I can't just leave my house whenever I feel like it. I don't have the money. Other wise, I would move out on my own. There are so many things I can't do. People say I need to do my own thing, but I sit here and ask, "How"? Again, what comes so natural to everyone else is a struggle for me. I'm drowning, but I can't swim and there's no one around to save me. To quote Maroon 5, "I am in misery. There ain't nobody that can comfort me." I don't really have people to hang out with, and I'm too busy working or my schedule is too conflicting. I feel powerless to escape this fate of living here within these four walls in the middle of nowhere. Besides, my parents expect me to tell them before I do anything. At this rate, I will be stuck here until my parents are dead and I'm forced to live somewhere else because it won't be my home. I will be stuck in this solitude. I want to make my own decisions, I just can't.