KaidaFaye Online

I'll do art for you: read on please!

Hey guys--because of the hurricane, my flea marketing opportunity won't be possible this weekend. That said, I'll be accepting commissions--I can do portraits, cartoons, whatever you want. I need to make $100 by Wednesday, so if I get 5 $20 commission slots, I'll be good. Help me out here!

Comic Soon!

Finally getting a new computer, it's coming in Monday or Tuesday <3 I just got a new set of pens to use for inking(I'm in love with my brush pen), but digital inking makes me feel less scared of mistakes. Same thing with colouring.

Finished another page of the comic yesterday, planning on 2 more today. That is all.

Personal Life Rant

Usually I don't do this, but I feel like it tonight.

I get that I messed a lot of shit up between me and him last year, but he still stayed with me, and still tells me that he loves me. I know it's hard trusting me again, but I'm true and dedicated to him, and I know that trusting me fully is gonna take a long long time, and I'm happy that he's still with me, even if we don't have a title. Knowing you still say "I love you" without any sex involved feels great, and probably why I can stand not having a title between us right now. But it hurts to hear that he doesn't think I miss him while he's spending 2 weeks in Europe. I love him. I seriously screwed up before, last year, but I love him and it probably sounds stupid coming from someone just entering college. I don't care. I'll keep trying to prove that I can be trusted.

I used to not treasure my relationships before because of a guy I used to be involved with. I forced him out of my life, he was no good for me. No matter what relationship you're in, if you recognize that it's good treasure it. Treat it special, otherwise you'll end up in my mess--all because I didn't appreciate what I had right in front of me.

Do I have enough tape?

Tue Sep 29, 2009, 9:44 PM

* Mood: Tired
* Listening to: A tutorial on the chain rule (AP Calc)

I have to tape the pages of my sketchbook because I found out in class today that they're perforated(so I had to tape over the lines so that they wouldn't fall out of my book in the future). I have a month to do the Summer project(18 pages in my sketchbook on a theme; mine is my unique 90s childhood). It's fun so far--I'm excited to start the project. I have 4 pages due on an artist related to my theme due Monday and a reference photograph of me relating to my theme due Thursday.

My dad learned how to make okonimiyaki--I'm excited. I took one to Jesus school so that I could eat, since I went from practice, to home for 15minutes, then to Jesus school. I asked the lady if I could eat; she said no, so about 5minutes later I just walked out with my stuff and ate outside...NOBODY GETS BETWEEN ME AND MY FOOD D=<

Happy anniversary-ish Mo and Cal!!! <3 Now if only I had a love live =3

Anyway, back to studying so I can start my AP 2D STUDIO ART homework XD *I'm getting too excited*

I need sleep.

-KF

Sad Songs on the Radio

Sun Sep 20, 2009, 8:58 PM

* Mood: Confused
* Listening to: "What Went Wrong?"-blink-182

I'm supposed to be over it. Why am I so crushed? I let him take over my life back then, and now I'm paying for it. His ex is now his girlfriend for the 50millionth time and now even though he's my best friend I can't even talk to him because she hates my guts.

Why did I even tell him those things? Why did I let him take everything? Why am I so upset about such a stupid person? Why even get annoyed by it? He's just a best friend. That I loved. From middle school And things happened over the past 4 years. He's not worth it. He was so much trouble. I can have a pick of basically whoever I want, I shouldn't be upset because he said things that usually don't happen. I shouldn't have believed him in the first place.

Why won't this all disappear? I keep letting feelings get in the way of things. It's nothing to kill myself over. I know the logic. The smart thing to do would be to drop everything related to him. But I know I won't. And I know he's gonna pop up at the least expected time again at my school or something and give me those eyes; then when my guard is down, those feelings I managed to put away will come leaking out for the millionth time, and things will start up again. Because I can't let go of things. I can't let go. I gotta chop my hands off.

Sorry for the emo-ness; I'm venting.

-KF