Howdy Howdy!
Oh boy do I have some stories to tell! A lot has happened in the last few weeks, hell even the last few days.
Booming business?
Of course I'll start with my angel readings. I've been getting a lot of good ideas for them which been working out quite well. It's kinda strange since I'm not use to something going this successful without a major hiccup in either the whole concept or just my emotions where I get discouraged. But alas! Things have been working out in my favor and I see myself being really successful in this! :D One of the major changes that I did yesterday was lowered the prices of most of readings. Then I went and opened up a free mini reading slam on the new agey forum that I use to frequent regularly. Oh boy, I was doing readings ALL AFTERNOON yesterday and best of all I got an order! :D So I was pretty busy yesterday, it felt really good.
Sitting here waiting for everything to happen when you want success so much is really tire some, but good things come to those who wait and I'm praying that this is MY TIME finally! And in better news I got my second repeat costumer today, I was so excited EEEEE! XD So yeah, things are really going well and SHAMELESS PROMOTION TIME if you're interested in a reading or at least want to try it out, I have the mini readings for $1.50! They are really fun, fast and insightful! :D
Facing my demons
Everything have been surprising emotional for me and one of the reasons is that I've challenged myself to face my most pressing issues! It's as crazy as it sounds but you know what, it's not that bad. I feel a lot more free being really really honest with myself about how bad I felt about myself and my life.
Even though I'm hellishly determined, I used that to cover up the constant pain and feeling like I'm not good enough in whatever I do. I can recover fast when I get hit hard by reality, but I never stop to think about what I'm really fighting for, and how it effects me. I just have a goal and I have to get to it, no matter what.
I want to be really successful and make a lot of money (and mostly move the fuck out), but I've been thinking about the destination way too much. To the point where I was just thinking about the "stuff" and all that I can do when I get there. But when I try too hard I burn out or have an emotional down turn, it trips me every time and I try again, then rinse and repeat.
When I decided to tackle this head on, I was just amazed of how complex of a system I was running off of. Where I made this "little world" in my mind that I had to overcome before I felt good enough to be successful, which was the reason of my "overly" determined nature. Even though my life has gotten "better" in some areas, I kept the "struggling" mentality with me and blew it up where "everything" was a challenge in a half. So yeah, nothing was working. At least not without busting my ass and/or running around in circles because I was making it that way subconsciously. And that was only the tip of the iceberg
I can honestly say that I NEVER came to such a realization before and it was probably a life changing one. Since that night I felt a peace of knowing that I didn't have to jump over the moon for success or climb over everyone else to get there. I can still be just as determined, but I know what I'm fighting for. Instead of wanting so much to cover up my deep feelings of lack, I just want to start doing what I love (card readings, art, crafts and etc) and get there when the time is right. I know what I want is mine already, I just have to get over myself to really get it. :)
I faced more demons as the days rolled by and I honestly feel a quality of self that I never quite felt before. It's like being totally sure of yourself but in a deeper way. This is just the beginning too, I'm not totally out the woods yet, but I can say that I probably faced my deepest issues.
WIP
Before I go, I wanted to show you all the sketch I just did! I didn't draw anything in a few weeks, but when I started drawing tonight I could see so much improvement. That and how easy it was to simply sit down, draw and have some fun. I started to get tense a few times, but I straighten myself out and let myself relax to have fun again. The drawing is so fun and fresh. I really want to see this picture though and finish it the way it's suppose to be!
Thank you all for reading and supporting me even though I've been busy with other things! Love you all, take care!
