HEY! I USED TO BE THE IDIOT SELLING THOSE STUPID VACUUMES!
Im kidding, as soon as I got into the house, this was my speach:
"Mr. and Mrs. Whatthefuck, my boss wants me to go through this little demonstration, show you how "dirty" your house is, and describe how our cleaner does what the others simply cannot. And then when Im done with my schtick, a sales rep other than myself is going to come in, and completely blindside you with numbers, credit applications, and other high pressure sales tactics."
"I will clean the room, say what needs to be said, and I will leave the decision completely up to you, I dont care, Im getting paid anyway, although the commission does certainly help."
I would finish with:
"Im done, I do want to apologize that the cute little girl who convinced you that all you were getting is a free carpet cleaning, but we know thats not the case, Im going to call my boss, he is going to bring in the aforementioned salesman, and Im most likely going to sit in the corner looking like an idiot why he tries to get you to buy this thing. Thanks for letting me in the house to begin with, its cold outside and this is better than walking around going door to door."
Scare tactics are like Sith Mind Tricks; those who are weak of mind cannot resist the inexplainable urges that result afterwards.
Nothin' like the Jedi one though. I mean, can you see Ben Kenobi standing in the detergent section of the store, waving his hand around as poeople pass? "That is not the cleanser you are looking for. Your kitchen sponge needs replacing. Aerosol Lysol only works on surfaces and not in the air." That's totally a thing Dooku would do.
Dust mites... *laughs* It's not like it's something new. :p Still, I'd enjoy seeing them in action just cause it would be funny to watch. Scare tactics are pretty silly usually.
I find it amusing that people think our butts and thighs are dirty...I mean, in retrospect, they're probably the cleanest things we have, as they don't make contact bare contact with anything other than underwear and pants...
Schultzie
Getaway Driver (Otaku Eternal) | Posted 07/14/08 | Reply
HEY! I USED TO BE THE IDIOT SELLING THOSE STUPID VACUUMES!
Im kidding, as soon as I got into the house, this was my speach:
"Mr. and Mrs. Whatthefuck, my boss wants me to go through this little demonstration, show you how "dirty" your house is, and describe how our cleaner does what the others simply cannot. And then when Im done with my schtick, a sales rep other than myself is going to come in, and completely blindside you with numbers, credit applications, and other high pressure sales tactics."
"I will clean the room, say what needs to be said, and I will leave the decision completely up to you, I dont care, Im getting paid anyway, although the commission does certainly help."
I would finish with:
"Im done, I do want to apologize that the cute little girl who convinced you that all you were getting is a free carpet cleaning, but we know thats not the case, Im going to call my boss, he is going to bring in the aforementioned salesman, and Im most likely going to sit in the corner looking like an idiot why he tries to get you to buy this thing. Thanks for letting me in the house to begin with, its cold outside and this is better than walking around going door to door."
And I wonder why I didnt succeed at that job. . .
Nehszriah
Hits Self With Axe (Otaku Eternal) | Posted 07/13/08 | Reply
Scare tactics are like Sith Mind Tricks; those who are weak of mind cannot resist the inexplainable urges that result afterwards.
Nothin' like the Jedi one though. I mean, can you see Ben Kenobi standing in the detergent section of the store, waving his hand around as poeople pass? "That is not the cleanser you are looking for. Your kitchen sponge needs replacing. Aerosol Lysol only works on surfaces and not in the air." That's totally a thing Dooku would do.
Be true, be you and of course, be otaku.
SunfallE
Nyaa~ (ZE MEANIE) | Posted 07/13/08 | Reply
Dust mites... *laughs* It's not like it's something new. :p Still, I'd enjoy seeing them in action just cause it would be funny to watch. Scare tactics are pretty silly usually.
In the name of the tune I will punish you!
Dagger IX1
Team | Posted 07/13/08 | Reply
Tapeworms.... delicious.
Katana
Goggalor (Otaku Eternal) | Posted 07/13/08 | Reply
I find it amusing that people think our butts and thighs are dirty...I mean, in retrospect, they're probably the cleanest things we have, as they don't make contact bare contact with anything other than underwear and pants...
"In Kat's wor we trust."
Shinmaru
Baron of Terribad (Otaku Eternal) | Posted 07/13/08 | Reply
If someone asks me whether I'd like to breathe in dust mites, I think I'll say yes and run with it. That would be fun.
Love thy Evangelion.