My darlings, welcome to Momma Love's Movies with Momma Love! You see, I've always wanted to do movie reviews and such but my friends always say that I'm stupid for trying because I don't know movies. Trust me, I've seen a ton of movies. Sure they're not diverse but I know the difference between good and bad. So, here is where I will tell you which movies you ought and ought not see. I know that won't stop some of you from going to the movies and seeing these horrible things but, if you go, see it in 2D. There's nothing more disappointing that seeing a terrible movie in 3D, you waste money and you waste precious time.
WARNING THERE WILL BE MAD SPOILERS IN THIS WORLD SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! I'LL TRY TO KEEP SPOILAGE TO A MINIMUM FOR MOVIES IN THEATERS BUT OTHER THAN THAT I WILL CONSIDER IT FREE GAME!
Without further adieu, welcome to Momma Love's Movies!
Next Review: Les Miserables (2012)
Strap on your diapers kids. You're going to piss your pants.
Not a scene went by during this movie where I wasn't holding my gut in raucous laughter. It was insane. When someone told me that the Chef from Gilmore Girls was going to star in a comedy alongside the pervy husband from Juno this is not what I expected at all. I thought I was going to get a chuckle in here or there. Instead I got laugh cramps. I don't know if those exist... but I had them. My sides and throat hurt from laughing so much.
Story/Plot wise, this movie's a bit confusing and the rest of it can be a little disturbing. But if you're having a bad week: buy yourself a ticket to Identity Thief and you'll be rolling around in the aisles, holding your sides laughing until you burst.
xoxo, Momma Love
Okay. Saw this with the boys and it was a little like Grimm meets Underworld in a way. Pure guts and gore for guts and gore sake, ridiculous 3D shots, fugly witches for the win, and a Gothic twist on a children's classic. This is by no means an Oscar worthy movie but it entertains. At least it entertains someone who likes the guts and gore purely for guts and gore. The violence gets to a point of impossibility that it's hilarious. I was laughing my way through 65% of this movie. I'm also insane so that could mean absolutely nothing.
So if you like guts, Jeremy Renner doing chicks in skeevy ponds, Gemma Arterton headbutting whoever she feels like, predictable plot twists, pervy dudes who grope you in your sleep, and Siamese twin witches crawling at you exorcism style, this movie is a must see.
Or if you're from Russia. Because this is a big hit over there. ;)
xoxo, Momma Love
Where to begin: The Magic of Disney, the Story of Pixar, and the Visual Brilliance of Dreamworks all wrapped up into one. That's Rise of the Guardians in a nutshell. And some might say an elementary school version of The Avengers. All I can say is that you'll love the banter between Bunnymund and Jack, you'll love North with his broken sentences and Russian accent, and... you'll love all of it! I don't know where to start! Jack is hilarious, Bunny is always irritated and perfectly Australian, North is adorable (in his own weird way), Tooth is zany and flits all over the place like the Hummingbird that she is, and Sandy... don't get me started on the little guy!
A true children's story that's enjoyable for all ages. With the well known voices of Hugh Jackman, Chris Pine, and Jude Law, everyone will having something to be nostalgic about. Falls slightly below the bar for spanning shots that're supposed to be "magical", other than that, Rise of the Guardians can do no wrong. Especially with Hugh Jackman, Chris Pine, and Jude Law.
xoxo, Momma Love
Okay, I don't like Katherine Heigl. She's in way too many romantic comedies, so many that I think she likes all the attention, fake or not, from other guys. I know that's probably not true but I can't help but think it from time to time. Though when all is said and done, 27 Dresses is an "O.K." movie. I give the movie a C- in original premise, a C in overall performance, and an A+ for James Marsden. Oh come on, you had to see that coming.
The movie itself carries very well from beginning to end, a consistent screwing over of our protagonist from her sister and the man she thinks she loves, and a consistency when it comes to her dedication to making other people happy. But, in the end, unexpected love and backseat car sex conquer all, proving that it doesn't matter if your movie is a little bland, if there's that chemistry, people will get hooked. Especially if half of the couple includes James Marsden.
Fluff Rating: 9/10, so much fluff. We all know who's going to end up together in the end but we'll sit their chewing on our nails until they finally admit that they love each other (see? No spoilers ;]).
xoxo, Your Loving Cherub Momma
One of my guilty pleasures, not going to lie. This movie is so utterly awkward and so completely funny! Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock have such amaaazing chemistry, sometimes I feel as if I'm intruding. The "I hate you so much that I love you" ploy isn't old and tired in this movie, it's completely plausible and you watch as their relationship blossoms from assistant and boss to reluctant yet completely devoted lovers! If only the rest of the movie followed suit. Le Sigh. Not the best movie out there, but Betty White and Kevin the dog make up for the lack of follow up.
You'll be laughing and eventually you'll be awwww-ing. Definite feel-good romantic comedy on the docket! A real must watch for this Valentine's Day season!
Fluff Rating: 6/10. It's not fluff but honest to Gandhi chemistry.
xoxo, Your Loving Cherub Momma
