23 skidoo
- Created By Cezieni
"Hay gaiz I'm bad at interacting with people so I'm just going to be a jackass, k?"
You know, when I first joined I was vehemently opposed to what was referred to by some as "the lobby crowd." I thought they were elitist assholes, every last one of them. They threw around in-jokes in what seemed like a purposeful attempt to alienate anyone who was new, and were generally into pwning n00blets (and I'd link to Sangome's Chatlogs of Doom world if it wasn't closed off to the outside world. Prior to the "clean-up" that was enacted on it, there were some great examples of Mods (and Friends of Mods) Being Dicks™. One that really sticks with me was the trolling of some kid from Indonesia (which contained the whisper: "Why are they always from there?" Because that doesn't sound racist in the slightest. How dare those non-native-English-speakers fall for your jokes?! But I'm getting off topic.) Post-clean-up, it was more or less one giant moderator circlejerk peppered with more in-jokes and a few discussions that anyone not within theO's inner circle would get booted for (a chatlog of the meaning of "69" comes to mind. It's supposed to be PG gaiz).).
But anyway, time went on and I actually came to know some of the mods. Beth and all of the golden ones are cool, even Kaydirt, who I originally detested. I still know nothing about Adam though, but I can live with that. I'd gotten over hating the moderators because I realized that they were just doing their jobs: they weren't elitist or wrongfully booting people for the lulz. I wish I could say the same about their friends though (actually, most of them are okay. But there's a select few that really piss the hell out of me.). And I thought I was past this phase. Then again, it's pretty hard not to rage when I read shit like this:
Giantprick* joined the room.
Giantprick gives Moderator diapers
Moderator: Hahaha.
Moderator: Thanks Giantprick.
Moderator: ;D
Giantprick: Moderator: distribute away!
Moderator: I was running out.
Moderator: Got any pacifiers handy?
Moderator: :P
Giantprick: here
Giantprick gives Moderator pacifiers
Cezieni: Oh, I see what you guys are doing there/
Giantprick left the room. (Going to Otaku Lobby)
Cezieni: Get it, because we're all immature
Cezieni: AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Cezieni: HA
*Names changed to protect an asshole.
Disclaimer: I'm not ripping on Moderator, despite the fact that she went along with the joke. I know Moderator and like Moderator. In fact, Moderator will likely be reading this and commenting on it. But Moderator, I just want you to know that I have the utmost respect for you. Giantprick, however, needs to read up on my favorite Russian philosophers, Phuckov and Di.
HOW FUNNY AND ORIGINAL!!!!1 I mean, who would've thought to mock people you don't like (and don't even know for the most part) by indirectly calling them immature through the use of items associated with babies? Not I, for certain. I haven't seen such innovative prop comedy since Carrot Top! But in all honesty, fuck you.
The sad thing is this is exactly the stuff that I railed against in my younger days: the elitism, the snobbery, the looking down upon anyone who decides to go to a room besides the Lobby or Solace. Please note that this shining example of douchery is also 23. Please refer to the title.
Listen: don't talk down to us. A good portion of the people in the non-lobby rooms are a lot younger than your 23-year-old self. And though I dislike saying it, you have much more "experience" with life. I'm not saying you have to like us, because I certainly don't like you. But at least be civil. Try to understand that we are that much younger than you, and less mature as a result of that (on second thought, how mature is the bullshit that I copy-pasted above?). Just think of the way you were as a teenager. I'm sure you've had your moments of sillyness, your moments of illogical passion, your moments of ignorance, and your moments of etc. So please let us have ours.
I just realized that I've been listening to a song called "I Fucked Your Dad."
What is opinion on this extremely important matter?
Well, what is it?
And on a completely unrelated note: the expoundation I promised last night. You see, I hate the drama surrounding e-couples with a burning, irrational passion. I mean, some people can make it work, and make it work exceedingly well (I'm looking at you Manda & Paul, and Korey and um... crap, I forget her name. I always want to say Sage of Magic, but I know it's not Sage. There was a whole fiasco involving her removal from the top charts awhile ago, but the name evades me right now...), but for the most part everyone involved in e-relations is extremely juvenile, shallow, exhibitionistic, and a slew of other negative adjectives about it. Need I remind anyone of Abdu and his 6-years-his-junior lover and their show-offy tendencies? Probably not, unless you're some new asshole. In which case, GTFO my world you avatarless piece of shit. Or how about the time Moses* grabbed his e-gf's boobs in public chat? And what about Fire and Rukia, hmmm? You see, a lot of these relationships are more or less based off of proudly displaying the fact that you're in a relationship as if it were a medal of honor saying, "Check me out! I'm not a total loser!" (without making use of any of the real interpersonal bonding that comes with a srs relationshoop). But here's the real reason I made that statement last night: the break-ups. The goddamn break-ups are so unbelievably messy, especially for an entirely text-based affair. I mean, I've always thought that the internet was like a magnfying glass for society, but this is ridiculous. Every negative aspect of a break-up is out front, magnified 20 times, standong right in the middle of the chatroom, shouting at anyone who happens to be there, and simply ripping ass with such frequency and power that the room quickly becomes a noxious and unbearable place. Listen, ladies: I get that your upset that your boyfriend broke up with you (side note: I've heard the "he didn't even do it in person" line way too many times on here. I mean... wow, just wow...), but that's no need to keep blaring "GO DIE" and "I HATE YOU" and "JERK blah blah blah etc." And no, putting a smiley face at the end of your bitchy ramblings is not cute; it's passive aggresive and, frankly, quite cliché at this point. And listen, friends of the heartbroken ladies: don't bear a vendetta against your gal pal's ex. Please. All your doing is making an ass of yourself and annoying the hell out of everyone present (seriously, when I kick you from my room, you know there's a problem. I never even go as far as handing out warnings.). And to be fair, listen, guys: we get that your heart was broken and you thought she was the one and so on, but don't BAWWWWWWWW to the rest of the chat. Srsly, we come for fun, not to console you for your petty problems. In the end, it really comes down to this: it's an internet relationship, for the love of Christ. And you're (we're, I'm, they're, etc.) teenagers, too! Relationships shouldn't be such heavy shit at our age. 999 times out of 1000, the person you're cybering with while touching yourself is NOT "the one" and will just be a vague remembrance after you hit college and stop showing up here altogether.
And I'm not saying everyone's like this, there are some pretty notable exceptions (see further up, along with a few others who handle these affairs maturely), it's just a trend I noticed (actually, what it really is is a sleep-deprived attack on the conventions of the day. I want a damn Pulitzer for this.). Later guys, I hope I didn't offend anyone too terribly, except for those who I meant to offend. In fact, most of the people I care enough about to worry about offending are intelligent enough to not be offended by this. So have fun being offended, the rest of you!
*Name changed to protect someone I'm actually partially fond of. But you can guess who he is if you just substitute "Moses" with another religious figure and are familar with the nicknames that I use. Or, if you were there you'd know as well. That works too.
PS - the song is by a band called "Bear Vs. Shark," if you're interested. Beyond excellent post-hardcore, sum good noiz right thar. Head over to your local rapidshare and don't not un-buy it today!
A Profanity-laced Tirade for Your Enjoyment and Edification
You know what, internet? It's one in the goddamn morning and I'm not even tired. Let me tell you something, internet: you are way too angsty for your own good. I mean, look at these people. They go to bed thinking everything's fine. They wake up the next morning and they're on fire. What the hell kind of world is that? I'll tell you what kind, internet: an apathetic one. Not a bad one or an evil one or whatever shit you thirteen year olds are calling it these days. I swear, if I have to hear one more self-righteous ass go on in chat about the steady decline of the world from the Golden Utopialand™ that it once was to the horrible-place-it-is-now-where-bad-things-happen-to-good-people(namely me)-and-the-environment-is-slowly-corroding, I'm going to pull out some leet hax0rs, give myself modpowers and permaban every single one of them (just imagine that: the chat without angsty jaded teens. Oh, what a world!)(P.S. - I have no such leet hax0rs. I was only making my rage clear. No need to ban me for being a threat to security.). And fuck your, "I hate people," shit. I hear that way too much in the chat. Every 14 year old and their grandmother hates people. Woop-dee-fucking-doo. We get it, kids: people do awful things sometimes. We start wars and blah blah blah, but that doesn't mean humanity should be written off entirely. But back to my original point: the world isn't evil, it just doesn't care about you. You think it's evil, though. You believe it's evil with all your heart. Well, internet, let me tell you my theory about this phenomenon. You, internet, are extremely self-centered. You can't stand the fact that the Universe is completely apathetic to your existence, so you write it off as evil and languish about it in chatrooms to the agreement and sympathy of your fellow Angst Machines and the annoyance of anyone who's graduated from high school. Soon, a giant circlejerk develops, with emo corners and "I hate life"s galore. And then I stay up all night and write something like this because you angsters and all your ilk infuriate me, especially when I'm sleep deprived. So in conclusion: HEY EVERYTHING! FUCK YOU!! That's a little joke for all the acoustic guitars in the audience tonight. But seriously, you guys suck.
And now I wish I was more coherent so I could develop these ideas further. Oh well, a task for another day, I suppose.
Oh god oh man
I make one post, I get a few views and one comment on it, and my world ranking inexplicably jumps from 10000-and-something to somewhere around 500. This shit doesn't make any sense.
Also: I hate when I try to do something nice for someone and then they prevent me from doing it. I absolutely fucking despise it. What about you, internet?
Pic related: it's my face when I try to cancel my other plans and take my girlfriend on a date and she's all like, "NOOOO, go do that other thing," and I'm like, "But I'd rather go have dinner with you D:" and she's like, "But I want you to go do that other thing," and I'm like, "Okay, maybe we can do something tomorrow?" and she's like, "But I have to study for my history midterm," which I understand because she wants to keep her grades up, but still. What the hell, internet. What the hell.
I mean, don't get me wrong. I love her and we have a perfectly healthy relationship, but sometimes things like this frustrate me.
End
