name: ayame sakura yuuki and my last name is confedential.
age: 16
b-day:9~29~93
location:currently? my room
born:okinawa japan
gender: seriously?
grade:high school
height: 5'4 1/2 exactly ^^
weight: 110.4 O.o;
relationship status: single for 16 years and...not loving it as much as i used to
home location:some where in the world
hair; currently in layers. naturally golden blond, currently Black on bottom and faded red on top (I need a bottle of red dye stat! or for my henna hair dye to FINALLY arive!! DX<)
eyes: dark green with blue, gold, and silver. they also change color
likes:poetry, the dark, drawing, reading, writing, singing, cosplaying, acting,school festival prep(sooooo much funner than the actual festival...ok, maybe not but its pretty close!!!)clean up festival duty(bon fire! and dancing!)pocky, martial arts
dislikes:going home after a festival(i once stayed at school a week to prepare, attend, and clean up after a festival! i didnt go home lol!)falling asleep on the train after a festival(...no comment)sweets otherr than pocky
favorite weapons: katana's, niginata's, anything sharp really, a solid bamboo staff with a red string tied to the top, a dodgeball, myself *evil grin*
nicknames:Aya, Hime, Saku,neko-chii(i tend to wear neko ears at times, chan-chan, mika-mika, doki-doki, kitsune, cherry, yuu-yuu, snow, koi, love, porcelain, marrionette, mistress, loli(lolita) poku, sweet-sama, Kawaii-chin, still doll
biggest problem: waaaaay to over protective older sister, look at relationship status -_-;;;
other problems: sleeping habits
biggest weakness:books
the one thing i'll run for in a store:...books
favorite color(s): blood red, turquiose, lavender, black, burgendy, pale pale almost white porcelin doll skin pink, hot pink( only when paired with black) neon yellow, emerald gree, saphire blue, ocean blue, blue-green, silver
favorite song currently: Kyandi Beibee by Kawabi Chieco
favorite music video currently: see above
ideal job(s): manga-ka (crosses fingers), daycare teacher ( kids love me and vice versa >U<), potter ( i love working with clay)

theotakuhostclub

kiss kiss fall in love

the nightmares

I still have those nightmares. Even though it’s been over two years since the last incident happened. It’s always the same. The fire, than the fight. The only difference is how old I am. Sometimes I’m the age of the fire, sometimes of the fight, sometimes both, and sometimes…I just watch.
The series of events that come are just like when they actually happened.
Elementary was when the fire happened. 3rd year there. My group was in with the counselor. We all loved her. She was fun and always seemed to have fun with us all. A girl ran into the room screaming frantically. She said there was an explosion down the a couple houses down from the school. We ran outside and automatically were engulfed in thick smoke. It hurt. It burned my eyes and I couldn’t see far ahead or breathe, ren-kun had to take my hand and lead me for fear I would fall and get trampled by our screaming schoolmates and teachers, although after a while we got pulled apart and lost each other, and since I had no idea where we were supposed to go, and was on the 2nd floor I got lost easily. The smoke got thicker as I ran around the slowly emptying corridors, and I felt I was suffocating. Ren-kun found me then and shoved me out the window where a firefighter was waiting to catch me, and he tumbed after.

That’s where the first part leaves off. Watching as he falls after me as I feel the firefighters arms around me hand me to another, screams everywhere. And where the second part begins.
We, Ren-kun, Blake, shiro and I, were outside our junior high school. It was our last year there and we were exited, this was going to be the best year ever! Shiro pointed out a car as it came speeding in, making a joke that I didn’t hear. I was to busy wondering how said car got in. I didn’t remember seeing that car before, and for our private school, only parents cars were allowed in. I was able to push it from my mind soon enough and I continued to mess around and talk with the boys. About five minutes later a man came up to us and asked us Akihabara, Akihabara. When we didn’t answer he moved on. We watched as we walked up the slope and along the school past other students, sometimes stopping to, we assumed, ask the same thing. Shiro joked that he was probably either looking for a dealer or looking to sell. After a while he came back again, and kept asking the same thing, Akihabara, to each of us in turn. When he turned to me and wouldn’t stop asking me, ren-kun got mad at him and slid over to be in between me and the man.
“yes. Akihabara” he answered angrily. If only I had said no.
The man grabbed Ren-kun by the front of his neheru and threw him down only to pick him up and hit him in the face and into the side of a car, all the while shouting “f***Akihabara!” pver and over. Shiro stood up and jumped on the man to get him away from Ren-kun while blake stayed with me and tried to calm me down and stop me from jumping in as well. So I had to watch as the man beat up two of my closest friends as another shook from the stain of not helping as he help me back and tried to shield my view. After what seemed like forever of screaming myself hoarse and crying my eyes red and watching them get slammed into cars and kicked in the ribs the man finally was content. He walked over to Blake and I, and looked at me. He offered his hand and said “shake my hand” when I shook my head no he started begging me to, not allowing Blake to get between me and him. He finally decided to leave and walked down the drive way the way he had came, givng one last kick to Ren-kun as he tried to get up. I just collapsed crying, from fear or relief I don’t know. The teachers came and took us to the office, the boys to the nurse and asked us what happened. We were there two hours before they decided that we could go home but we would talk to the physiatrist tomorrow. As we left, it gets in slow motion. Several people had stuck around, and as we left the office cleared a path for us. As exited the school we saw the man getting shoved into a police car. When he looks up and I swear he’s looking at me, I am finally allowed to wake up. It happens the same over and over, as if I am not allowed to forget those terrible days. And every time I wake up I just cry in fear that they would happen again…only the next time, the endings won’t be as nice

i'm falling down

I’m falling down now
And I fear I’ll never stop
Past the bleeding clouds and through the bleeding moon
My eyes bleed black and my lips glow bright
And everything is going to be locked away tonight
I fall past you and where I used to be
I ignore your hand
This is my punishment to bear
I see the bottom coming up fast
The place where before I should utter my words of last
The sky around me bleeds
Blue to green
To red to all the colors in between
In a different situation I would have thought beautiful
The bottom comes quickly
Higher and higher to reach me
To introduce me to my fate
Bloody and gruesome
I reach with an arm so frail and broken
Up to you
Even though it is useless
My eyes bleed more and I can already feel the piercing
of what lies below me
but before it comes
I must say one thing
And that is that for you I fell
I would feel my life drain away over and over again
Because I-
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its not that good haha ^^;

i found this video. its so cool to watch. plus the songs awsome too haha >U<

No title

The songs I sung
Are locked inside my mind
Never to return
My childhood is lost to time
M innocence cowers from the hatred
That reigns supreme
I laugh when I want to cry
Afraid to show weakness
To the monster of the day
Stuck drawing pictures that represent my fears
Looking out the window
Wondering if anything is real
Waiting for the color to fade
Into dismal shades
Of what could only be true reality
Hidden in the darkness
I dream about the day
For when the times are right
And I can be that innocent child once more
And hatred is overturned by love