Heart-Broken Freak

Shupple

Everything was like any other in a dream, where it could be reality or not, but in my dreams, it was never a happy or joyful dream. It was always a death ridden dream. I stared at my mother who stood in front of me with my father, they’re arms wrapped around each other like always when I got home from school, away from the pain and teasing inflicted on me. But this time, it was when I was fourteen and it was the last time I ever got to see my parent’s happy.

Their smiling faces grew as I walked up to the cave and entered in like any other day, telling the lies of what had happened at school, instead of the truth. Mom gave me hot chocolate since it was spring and it was damp, cold, and wet outside. Dad started to tell me an old story of when he fought this gigantic battle that had been against ghosts and darkness and how his friends and he grew to overpower it, which explained so much of the power given to me. Just as Mom was about to go outside, a spear was immediately lodged straight into her stomach and out the other end of her back and near her spinal cord. They went for Dad immediately as he tried to protect me, but even though I was fourteen, I still didn’t know how to use my powers. I wanted to go to Mom, help her as much as I could, but that didn’t happen. I was knocked out with a gun almost immediately, but I was left, seeing how I hadn’t evolved into a Banette yet. That’s when I woke up the next morning after being knocked out, and seeing Shift standing in the opening of the cave.

My own eyes opened to the ceiling inside my room, the cold bed around me and I drenched in cold sweat. I couldn’t believe I had dreamed about that. I hadn’t remembered that since the days after I lost Mom and Dad. A cold empty feeling grew inside my stomach as I sat up, and I realized that I was really hungry, and I needed to get to Mear, and see how he was doing. I hope he got enough sleep.

I swung my legs to the side of my bed and just as I was about to get my slippers on, Lux opened up the door and stumbled in, falling on his back almost immediately. I could see he was in too much pain. There were tattoos surrounding his body and his aura was gigantic as this whole room. I had only seen those tattoos once or twice before, but Lux…? What was wrong with him?

Lux looked up to see me, staring at him on the ground. I was worried almost immediately, and I knew he was scared and upset. I just didn’t know why. I wanted to help him.

“Oh my gosh Lux, are you okay?” I asked after some hesitation and kneeled down to him and tried to put my hand gently on his forehead but was shocked by a black electrical current. I flinched from the pain it inflicted on my hand, but I wasn’t bleeding at all. Just… had a black mark on me.

Almost immediately from me reacting to such, Lux pounced up and was standing once more.

“Sorry Shupple, I need to go….” I grabbed his wrist. I knew he was in pain. I could tell something had happened to him that upset his heart so badly and brought up bad memories in the process. I then hugged him from behind but wasn’t touching any of him. Just his shirt and that was it, and there was no electrical current on that. I knew I couldn’t be shocked again, but I just wanted Lux to calm down. It was real, no matter what he thought.

“Shupple? Please let go, I don’t want to be hurt again and I don’t want to hurt you.” My grip loosened slightly as I heard this. Who had hurt him so badly to have his soul being ripped apart, piece by piece at his own demand?

“Who hurt you?” I asked, wanting to know so that I could help him, but he just got out of my grip and ran out of the room. I wanted to chase after him, but I could already hear arguing down the hallway. Maybe he just had to sort things out… I hoped he would feel better soon at least.

I sighed and sat on my bed as I took the slippers that were beside it and slipped them on my cold feet. I collected my own thoughts before I stood up. I would help Lux later, wherever he was. I knew I had to do that, at least. The cold feeling in me didn’t get better, and neither did the black spot on my hand. Maybe… if I talked to Mear about what just happened… maybe he would understand…

I walked over to my door and was about to walk out to get breakfast when my foot bumped into something that wasn’t the door. I looked down and saw it was an envelope that Lux must’ve knocked aside when he entered into my room. I picked it up, it being thin and somewhat dusty from the floor, and turned it to the front as I sat back down on my bed. It had my name on it, written in Mear’s handwriting with his insignia in the corner. It made me smile.

I turned it around and undid the binding that held it closed, and pulled out the sheets of paper. A few of them were blueprints and one was a note. I put the blueprints and the envelope aside on my bed as I read the top of the note, it saying,

“Shupple, I’m so sorry, but I had to do this. I have to return back to my colony… without you. It’s to get my artist’s block away, and there’s no possible reason of why you should come along. I feel bad about doing this, but it’s for the best, isn’t it? I’ve been ignoring you and sewn into my own thoughts lately and I never pay attention to you. I’m sorry, but I have to leave. I have to break up with you. I can’t have you until I’m better, and I don’t know when that’s possible. I don’t know if… we’ll ever be together again. I’ve left behind some blueprints for you so that you can help repair the house, the one I built. I’m sorry, but I have to break up with you. I’m so sorry. Mear.”

The tears came faster than my own heart beating. The note slipped out of my hand as my breaths came out ragged and broken. I couldn’t breathe. It processed in my mind as I sat and covered my eyes with my hands that grabbed my own hairs and clutched it like I had nothing to clutch onto anymore. I had nothing to clutch anymore, nothing to hold or to help. He had broken up with me… Why? He had admitted liking me days ago and it was until recently he was distant. Why couldn’t I follow him? I had no right to, not anymore.

He was gone, away from me and away from all that was around him. His greatest masterpiece of a mansion, and his girlfriend… No… his ex-girlfriend. Why did this have to happen again? How many times to I need to be in pain and torture and suffering? Such pain as teasing and closing me off from the world as such pain inside? It was just like when I grew up, tortured with teasing and bullying, because I was the one that stuck out like a sore thumb, unable to defend and unable to help myself. He woken these memories with a boot in the ass. I felt left, lonely, afraid, and scared like when I was little.

I was the little goth girl that stuck out, made sure to be made fun of, never made any friends except from guys who were just like me. The freak of natures that never got a heart given to. I was the heart broken freak and I knew it. I don’t care if I was negative towards myself. It happened all the time, even though I wasn’t emo. A freak of nature because I could see the future and the suffering in store before it happened.

Why would anybody want to be with me? Mear left me for his own thoughts to collect, to become with himself again instead of redoing things over and over again, replying in the mind like a broken record stuck on the same part over and over again. I cried and kept on crying. I really liked Mear… more than I had liked anybody in the small world. My heart felt doomed and crushed on. Like somebody was making sure to hurt me over and over again. He never really kept his promise. I was hurt more than ever and he left me in it, not even a goodbye to the face. Just a simple, crappy note.

I made no sounds, no nothing. If anybody wanted to step in on me crying, go right ahead. I wouldn’t make any sounds, no bawling, no nothing. I would just cry, and wouldn’t stop. Nobody could comfort me as the memories surfaced, reminding of the pain and crap I had had in my life. There were no such things as happy memories. You only remembered the ones that were hell to you, not the ones that were happy in your life.

We were only freaks…

*Flashback*

“Hey, look at the little freak! She dresses goth, and she’s a wimp!” A Jigglypuff sang in front of me as she pushed me into the mud puddle and the water splashed around me and covered me in grime.

“Stop picking on me! I’ve never done anything to you!” I cried up as I tried to stand up but the Jigglypuff, Jenna, just pushed me down again and I cried.

“You haven’t done anything to us? You being here is disgusting!” Jenna laughed and all of her friends surrounding her in pink laughed off and they went off, singing their stupid tunes that attracted all the guys in fourth grade. I sat in the mud puddle and cried until I heard more voices in front of me. Guy voices. They weren’t the normal voices as before like every day.

“Hey, you okay?” I looked up from my fists that were covering my eyes and just sniffled. It was a guy with white hair and yellow eyes. I had seen him around before. He was at least four years older than me…

“No, not really,” I sniffled as I stood and rubbed my eyes with my fingers.

“Well, my buddies and I will help get those girls back if you’ll be our friend! You seem really cool! I’m Shift, by the way,” Shift held out his hand and I hesitated before I shook it. I had never had a friend before. Never. Nobody ever bothered to spend time with me before beside my parents.

“I’m Shupple…” I told him back, my voice shaking and he just smiled.

“Nice to meet ya, Shupple! These are my buddies, Tanner, Ivy, and Snow! Tanner’s a Tangela, and I think you know him already.” I nodded and smiled at Tanner. He was the real only friend I had outside of school. I didn’t know we went to the same school. “Ivy’s an Ivysaur, and Snow’s a Snover! I’m a Nuzleaf! What are you?” Shift asked and I cringed back a little. I didn’t really know who they were at the time. They were nice people and all, but each of them had a similar past like mine. They were picked on too.

“I’m… I’m a Shuppet,” I said quietly and he smiled.

“That’s cool! I heard around school that you have a weird power. What is it?” I felt like I was growing smaller, not fitting in even with these guys.

“I… I have Foresight. I was born with it… Nobody else in the line of Shuppets have Foresight, so I’m the first one… I can see the future and stuff,” I said quietly and he just grinned widely.

He didn’t know though about my other power. That I could only really survive in darkness and not sunlight. The only reasons why I had friends that were ghosts and dark Pokemon alike were because I lived in darkness itself. He didn't know I could heal with darkness or use chants to empower people or make them better by just using darkness. Even bring back people from the dead.

“Well, I don’t think that’s weird! It sounds awesome! Why don’t you hang out with us for some time? We’re all some weirdo around here. We’re kind of like freaks, but in a good way. Come on. Let’s go play hopscotch.” I followed.

*End Flashback*

Everything had changed since then. I had liked Shift for a while… and then he just turned me down when I told him. He was just a fluke; a one of a kind bastard. Why did Mear leave? He didn’t have to if he had just asked me. Nothing was right anymore. Everything around me was just darkness, filled with the sorrows of past lives and the future. Even though I may not have visions all the time, I still had Foresight.

I was broken within myself, and torn apart from the inside. I had to use Foresight now, to see what was going on, to see if I could find Mear for him to explain to me. I kept on crying as I summoned up the darkness around me and closed my eyes.

“Fo…. Foresight,” I cracked my voice before I opened my eyes and found myself in darkness.

I was standing on a platform, surrounded by pools of water that showed what was happening and what was to happen in the future. There was nothing in future. Just shadowed darkness. I looked at the present and saw nothing of Mear. I saw Lux in one picture, and then another. A few were of Gil or Aberius or the rest of the people in the mansion and the small destruction of the mansion itself. But no Mear. Did he really disappear from me? I felt like I just didn’t know him anymore. But I needed to go and help right now… Even if I did look like a mess.

I blinked and I was back on my bed, still crying as I stood up, grabbed my jacket and rushed out the door to the outside, I wiping away the tears from my eyes as I flipped the hood over my head and went outside to find everybody out there, murmuring amongst each other about Lux. I had to concentrate on the matter at hand. Not… on Mear.

Tears started to well up in my eyes but I shook them away and went over to Gil, who was bleeding in multiple places. I walked over to Lupe and looked at her.

“That damn bastard…” Lupe muttered and then she noticed me.

“What’s up, Shupple?” Lupe said in the most straight forward way she could. I knew she was trying.

“What’s…” My voice cracked again. “What’s going on?” I asked and she looked up over to the trees and the mountain behind it.

“Something’s up with that damn Lux. Don’t know what though. Why are your eyes red?” Lupe asked and I shook my head.

“Nothing… Nothing we need to talk about n-now,” I stuttered a little and she looked at me and then shrugged it off.

“Whatever fits your boat,” she sighed.

“You know… I think we just need to let Lux calm down,” I told Lupe and she looked at me like I was crazy. “He’s been under stress with everybody and his own mind is clouded. He can’t… think straight. He’s just too filled with darkness and stress. He just needs us to be his friends right now, I think,” I told Lupe and she just looked at me, stumped.

I just looked off into the distance, looking over at the mountains. Everybody was quiet as a scream ran out, and it wasn’t among us. It was off in the distance and everybody’s auras were spinning wildly, wanting to know what was happening to Lux, some of the mad or upset. Some of them just sat there, dumbfounded.

Lupe then sighed and then went to the front of the group and addressed them all, saying something about that we needed to be Lux’s friends when he got back. I just hoped he would come back. I stared off into the distance, and tried to focus on the matter at hand, and not Mear.

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So yeah... That was depressing to make, but that is what Shupple does think when she is like that. I revealed a lot of her past, and I hoped it helped some too. I found Shupple to be very similar to Lux in ways with childhood. What do you think, Iruka-chan?

So yeah, that was the note, and now Shupple will talk later about Mear being gone. Had to get things to a point, I guess, on where everybody would be. What do you guys think?

Featured in this post: Tanner, Lux, Lupe, Gil, Aberius, Mear

~Anime-chan (Seven pages, but that doesn't really count for anything, does it? XD)

End