I love manna. Manna from creatures that are larger than me... just a little is potent enough to allow me to reach euphoria. That is probably because I never worked my way up to it like my peers did. I stayed at a lower point, no risk of killing anyone. But he ruined it. Just by taking a little, I can never go back to petty animals. Each time I take some I will want more and more. I felt my need for it after I left school grounds. I came close to biting a guard that got too close. He smelled good, different from killer fish, but still good.
I liked being back at home. Though the food made me slightly sick, after a long time without eating and just occasionally taking manna from an animal, swallowing my mother's cooking was hell. The clothes were freeing. It made me feel free again. Minoru has grown up well with my aunt. He is engaged, to be wed in a year or less. The government decided to release my father's body. Mother decided to burn it.
Everything was good in the beginning. My aunt was smiling and Cousin Minoru was proud that he had finally left school. But then, Mother didn't smile at me. I wore my hair up around the house, keeping within the Elf traditions of an unmarried women, so did my mother. I asked her about it. She said she is making arrangements to remarry but until then she plans to forget that these past 17 years didn't happen. The year with my father, the 16 years of my life, they didn't happen, I didn't happen, the war isn't happening. I will not be seeing Minoru again, or Auntie, or Mother.
I am not human, but from now on by using manna, I will live like one.
-Takahashi Kumiko
