I feel like there's something holding me back in life. I never seem to get anywhere. Anytime I get my hopes up, I shouldn't have. Everything just gets shot down. I keep getting rejection after rejection in jobs and no one feels for me beyond friendship. I should be beyond that, and yet, there's something that tells me I need someone, especially when I think about what's going to happen after my parents die. I need to get my life in order, but so far, I'm not having any luck. Decent jobs pass me by - not because I'm not trying to get a better job. I am. If I do find someone to love, I wonder if he wouldn't be scared away from a girl like me, a sheltered woman. I got to thinking last night in bed, and I wouldn't know half of the things I should know. *sigh*