"You kissed my brother?" Argos demanded, throwing the diary at raze's feet. He apparently had no shame. Raze was changing, trying to put up her hair and get dressed and try to look present able and in the midst of that, her belligerent ass of a meister decided to barge in.
"Do you mind," She growled around a bobbi pin in her teeth. "I'm half naked."
"We're a little past that." Argos quipped. "Anyway, when were you going to tell me about that?"
"When you decided to tell me you went out with Sai while I was in Washington state getting electro-shock therapy."
___
"What happened last night Raze?" There was desperation in Argos's voice. It was like he needed Raze to tell him or he wouldn't sleep at night. It was like he cared about what had happened instead of being to angry to care. Raze sighed and looked up at Argos.
"Is now really the time?"
"Better late than never."
She groaned. "Look, I don't want to talk about it here. We're in the middle of class."
"Everybody's talking anyway, its philosophy for christ's sake. Noone pays attention during core classes, they won't even hear you."
"Argos," Raze said, firm, "Look if this is going to workout, you need to get something straight. I have limits and boundaries, just like you. Lets put that a different way. Argos, tell me what happened the night you got that scar."
Argos froze. "What scar?" His voice was too defensive to be playing along. Raze wasn't sure what to do. Did he actually have a scar? She had just made something up. Something she'd figured might have a personal story like most scars did.
"I was just giving an example," She stuttered, embarrassed. She tucked som hair away behind her ear and fiddled with a bobbi pin. "Sorry, I didn't mean to. I didn't know."
Argos still looked agitated. His jaw was tight and he was tense. Eventually he relaxed, letting out a gush of air. "No, it's nothing. You're right I won't ask anymore." they were silent until the bell rang.
After class, Raze waited for Argos for the first time. They walked silently back to the dorm together pretending not to see the people staring.
"Can we talk in your room?" Raze asked.
"Sure." Argos said. "No problem." He still seemed tense from the abrupt end of the conversation during class.
____
"Raze, stay here. Just for tonight, stay in here."
She turned in the doorway, looking at the playful smile curling on Argos's lips. "Don't be so forward, Wellington, people might say you're a loose woman."
"If anybody thinks I'm a woman they must be blind as a bat."
Raze laughed, trying to be quiet since it was late at night. She crept back into his room, shutting the door softly behind her. She lifted up the heavy comforter and slipped in beside Argos. She fit beside him like a nesting doll.
"I want to be big spoon, so you remember who wears the pants in this..." She hesitated. It was barely noticeable but Argos picked it up, "Partnership."
Argos squirmed over onto his other side and let Raze snuggle into his back. Suddenly he felt embarrassed that he wasn't wearing a shirt. He was glad it was dark, or shed she his face turn bright red. For a moment everything was quiet. then he said, "Is that what we are? Partners? Thats what this is?" It wasn't an accusation. Far from it. Argos simply wanted to know.
Raze's small hands alighted on his shoulder. She pulled her self up to his ear and waited. She waited for everything to go quiet again. For that little noise in the back of your heed to buzz in your ears after too much silence.
"You tell me."
Usually, Argos wouldn't have taken the risk. He'd wait for her, he'd take things slow, he'd think things throughout but tonight something was different. When he felt her breath tickle his ear he just couldn't keep holding back. He turned over again, to face her. They were in such close proximity. He pulled her even closer. Raze wasn't idle, though. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he bent ever so slightly forward and they were kissing. It happened a lot like a second or third kiss might unravel, instead of a first. It was exploration without fear of rejection or constraints of shyness and it lasted a while.
However, Raze's fingers trickled down Argos's body in lazy streams and soon his did the same - coyly toying with hems and seems until fabric was bunched by Raze's shoulder's and it was easier to just get rid of it. He really hadn't meant to take her shirt off, or at least he hadn't planned on it because he had definitely meant to.
Somewhere in the midsts of the touching and kissing "I love you" was whispered into necks and hair and mouths and skin - and it was sincere.
_______
For weeks, Argos felt empty. Raze was gone, even though she'd promised to stay. She'd left without so much as a goodbye; she didn't even leave a note. The day after she'd gone, Gail had come to their apartment and taken some of his pictures of him and her. He didn't even argue, he just let her take all of the little reminders, all of the things that would remind him of Raze's absence. Pictures or not, he was barely functioning. Anything he did was robotic. There was no emotion in his eyes. Often, Chide would try to talk to him and get him to understand that Raze was going to come back. He would try to convince him she was treating him like a stranger because it was a necessity.
But Chide didn't know how deep the wound was. Sure, everyone thought that he was the foundation for the stable partnership - the functionality. Everybody, even Chide thought that he was the one chaining Raze. They were all wrong. She'd been the one to change him. Raze Harlow was the first person he'd opened up to, ever. He didn't understand how, even through the madness, she could forget how he'd given himself completely. How could she forget? How could she just cut him off, pretend that nothing had happened? She'd stooped lower than ever before, he thought. Paris was one thing - they'd hardly been partners then. But to run now? He felt like he didn't even know who she was. Everything she'd ever said to him might've been a lie, the most recent the most painful.
He grew resentful, hateful, and spiteful. He was alone, addicted to his own sadness, resigned to feel that way.
