Dear diary,
Well.... I spent a few days here in fairy tail so far..... I judged them too early and i might be doing it again now but... the guild is a very nice place actually! everyone is smiling and having fun..... while i was in that corner that i found alone reading..... i didn't attempt to speak to anyone until now because i am too shy... i mean they know their magic and how to control it and I AM 18 YEARS OLD AND STILL CAN'T CONTROL THAT STUPID REQUIP MAGIC OF MINE!!! i hate myself so much for that.... well anyway... when the master was introducing me to the guild he told me about this wizard who was apparently called Cecile.... she has trouble hearing and so the only way to communicate with her at the moment is sign language.. but i know sign language! i want to try and speak to her but i am still in this shy/traumatized stage..... i mean what if i get mad because of something a swing a bunch of flying swords at her or someone else like i did..... that time.... in the past..... I WOULD NEVER WANT THAT TO HAPPEN TO HER! NEVER!.... but i also came here to learn how to control it.... i don't know what to do and i am confused.... but i really want to get to know Cecile and the rest of the guild members! but until now.... i am still stuck in that corner reading... alone.... isolated.... as usual....

love,
Alice.