"Oh God of dust and rainbows, help us see
that without dust the rainbows would not be"
-Langston Huges

HOPE spelled w/ a Q. HOPE HQ. fun fun.

Happiness

What makes you happy?
Now, before you go and anwer your favorite person or food or TV show, think. What honestly makes you happy? The real kind of happy that can't come and go on a whim. People are selfish and ignorant, food and TV are inanimite so they don't care about you at all [people are awfully close in awareness levels to them] and really don't solve anything but hunger and boredom, hobbies don't always cheer you up or distract you like they should, money only lasts so long, and living by itself is filled with constant annoyances of one kind or another. Add to that the human tendancy to run through several emotions within a single minute effortlessly.
So- what makes you really happy?

real

i'm just writing this for fun.

Lots of people don't think God exists because of technical things, or because life isn't perfect, or because thier prayers didn't get answered when they felt they should have been, or all three and then some. Then they go and believe science and nothing and everything, which definitely makes for good 5 hour conversations on everything they do and don't believe, but not much else. It's hard to understand from the outside looking in why they don't see what i see, but they feel the same about me. The way i see it, God is real. That, and he's pretty awesome. The way i see it, God is the best artist, scientist, and parent there ever was and ever will be. Think about it you egnostic/athiest/others, when you look outside at any given moment, things work together. Not only do they work together, they do it beautifully. sunsets are made of perfectly complementing and contrasting colors to give just enough wonder off that when you look at it you can't help but pause for a second and let your eyes try to fully interpret it to your brain [if you really wanna delve into it, i bet your eyes can't even interpret everything that's there, and even if they could, your brain wouldn't comprehend it]. Birds' feathers are colored so they can hide or be seen according to thier purpose. Leaves up high grow green, grass down low grows green, blue sky inbetween and below, blue water filling the nooks and crannies. Flowers with identical, muti-colored petals, BUTTERFLIES. Butterflies with thier dust-painted wings, intricate and delicate, collecting the pollen and breeding the flowers. What in the universe is more amazing than that?
When you look inside of things, you find skin and muscles and bone and tissue clinging together in just the right way to protect you organs and to function and to do amazing things like write and run. Even deeper, cells. trillions of little, purposefull things, each one of them, doing thier specific job tirelessly keeping you alive.
Cool thing about those things are they all do certain things for certain purposes. They all know they have to do one thing to get another and so they do it, even plants. They all contribute to one another. How do they know do this? what convinced them to be and to hide and work and grow change? certainly not themselves, certainly not the earth. the earth doesn't think, you see, and if you stick a bird in a large room with an open window, very rarely does it think to fly out before it dies of starvation.
What told the earth to turn on it's axis and fly around the sun? What made the sun? What made the water on earth? cosmic space dust in a vaccum? [ever watched one of those things? when there's nothing there, in the vaccum, nothing ever comes out of it, it's almost and entertaining as watching paint dry]
And then there's us. Human beauty, each one of us is born special and beautiful and meaningful, just like plants and bugs and animals and cells and sunsets. Thing about us is tho, we have more complex thought patterns so we think that we don't need to serve our purpose or do our part to get what we want. and so we tend to suck at existing, but that's not my point. getting back to my point, we think, as do animals. Hand-in-hand with thought, in humans anyway, is a sub-concious. Dreams, the existance of dreams is wonderful food for thought, how, if we are truely just a mass of meaningless, disposeable cells created by magical cosmic dust coming from nowhere, could we see things in our minds that are not real? How do we dream of things one night, and see them happening in real life the next day? certainly not by little electrons spinning in our heads at night, what do they know?

Going back to the people i don't understand- God didn't answer the Hebrew's prayers for 400 years when they were brutally enslaved by the Egyptians, and then he squished egypt like a bug after it had built up enough [with the help of Moses and his buddy], so they would remember his goodness and glory, they forgot him alot in the next 40 years, so he kept making mini-statements like the wall of Jerico [i know that's misspelled] and the ten-commandments and stuff like that, and i'm sure you're just as forgetful as them sometimes, so patience is a good thing to have in times of need. Technical people, i just listed lots of technicalities there for you. Perfect people, i wrote an essay for you in english once, short summary: Without rain, how could there be rainbows?
For those everything and then some perople;....sucks to be you. I'm sure you're all wonderfully angry, bitter, confused little people, and i wish you the best of luck w/ life.