Chapter 2
Two days had passed since Kai had turned up on Tala’s door. Tala had no idea that Kai’s self-harming was so bad at first, but now he had to take to hiding every sharp object in the house, just so Kai wouldn’t get his hands on them.
Needless to say, this pissed Kai off greatly.
But Tala wouldn’t give up. He had sworn he would make Kai better, and make him better he was going to! Tala had told Kai to put something warm on, because he was going to take Kai out to the park and to a café, or wherever Kai felt like going, if only to get Kai out of the house.
But one of the main reasons that he wanted Kai out of the house was because Elena would not stop calling Tala ‘Yuriy’, and it was really infuriating him. It was possibly the only thing that had amused Kai since his arrival, though, and he continuously tried to ask Elena why she called Tala ‘Yuriy’. Tala couldn’t take any more, and this was why he’d planned a day outside of the house.
“Do be careful, won’t you, Yuriy. This is a dodgy part of town,” Elena warned her son as he put his coat on.
Kai sniggered.
“I think I can handle myself, Mother,” Tala said, pushing Kai out of the door as he talked. “We’ll be back around four.”
Elena didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, as Tala quickly shut the door behind him. He winced a little as the cold Moscow air hit his face, instantly making his nose red. Kai was already shivering to keep warm.
“Ok, I think the park’s out of the question,” Tala said, as he and Kai started walking down the street.
“Hmm.”
Tala glanced at his friend, who was staring at the ground as he walked. He wanted desperately to give Kai a hug, but two males having that sort of contact in this part of town would earn them a beating.
“Where do you want to go?” Tala asked.
“Dunno,” Kai replied shortly.
“You’re not a lot of help.”
“I know.”
Tala stared at Kai, as the last two words were said more miserably than any other. Tala continued to give his friend glances every now and again, but not once did Kai ever look up. As Tala saw that they were approaching the café he had mentioned to Kai earlier, he tapped Kai on the elbow, and pointed to where they would take sanctuary from the cold.
Once inside, Tala made Kai sit down at a table, and went to the counter to order two cups of tea and two toasted teacakes. Once Tala had handed the money over, he went to join Kai at the table. Kai was absent-mindedly playing with the salt-cellar. Tala watched as Kai continued to play with the salt, only sparing a glance and a quick ‘thank you’ to the girl who brought over their tea and teacakes.
“Can we go to a stationery shop?” Kai asked quietly, heaping three spoonfuls of sugar into his tea.
“Sure,” Tala said. “Can I ask why?”
Kai shrugged. Tala twitched his nose, and took a bite out of his teacake.
“I want some pencils… And paper… I want to keep myself busy by drawing, or writing, or something,” Kai said quietly.
“I didn’t know you were the creative type,” Tala commented, sipping his tea.
“There’s still a lot you don’t know about me.”
“Yeah… Like the fact that you wear nail varnish?” Tala raised his eyebrow.
Kai smirked.
“I borrowed it off your Mum. When I asked her for some dark nail varnish, she must’ve thought I was going to draw things over the house with it or something. But like I said to her after painting my nails, I’m depressed, not crazy.”
Tala snorted, and finish his teacake off. Kai got up, demanding that Tala take him to a stationery shop. Tala looked at Kai’s untouched tea and toasted teacake, but left the warmth of the little café, anyway.
Half a block down, Kai and Tala reached a stationery shop. Tala thought Kai was going to demand all the expensive stuff, but all he asked for was some paper, two HB pencils, and a pencil sharpener. Kai had said that he would pay for them, but Tala got his wallet out first.
“You didn’t have to buy me them,” Kai said, scowling.
“They hardly cost anything. And anyway, this is my Mother’s money I’m spending. She seems to think that she can make up for 13 years of absence by giving me money.”
Kai smiled at Tala, who returned the smile. When they returned to the house, and entered the kitchen, Tala immediately lit up a cigarette.
“You haven’t smoked all day…” Kai commented. “Why have one now?”
“Because all day I’ve thought about nothing but making you at least smile a bit. Now that we’re back here, I just want to annoy my Mother,” Tala smirked, exhaling some smoke.
Kai shook his head, and retreated to his bedroom. Tala had offered to keep him company, but Kai had politely declined, just wanting to be alone and keep himself busy.
“Thank God you boys are alright,” Elena said, trotting into the kitchen to check on the food she was making for supper.
“We were hardly about to be killed for going to buy a couple of pencils,” Tala replied, raising an eyebrow.
“Yuriy, can you please put that thing out? Or at least smoke it outside?”
“Stop calling me Yuriy!”
~*~
Upstairs, Kai got out his little supply of things to keep him busy. Instead of drawing straight away, he took out the little pencil sharpener, and examined it. It was all held together by one little screw. It surely wouldn’t be that hard to break it.
Putting it onto the floor, Kai stood up, and stamped on it as hard as he could with his foot. Seeing it broken into pieces, Kai picked up the one part of it that he was actually interested in, and which was the one part that couldn’t break.
Holding up one of Tala’s lighters to the blade, Kai pressed the button, lighting the flame, and ran it over the blade, sterilising it for what he was about to use it for.
~*~
An hour had passed, and Tala had decided that Kai had been a little too quiet for his liking. Sure, Kai wasn’t likely to have a party up in his room, but Tala had at least expected Kai to come back down to ask what the terrible smell radiating from the oven in the kitchen was.
Tala ignored his Mother’s curses about the food being burnt, and the house being filled with smoke, and went up to Kai’s room to make sure Kai was OK. Tala knocked on the door to Kai’s room, and when he received no reply, he just walked in. Tala gasped as he saw Kai dragging the blade of the pencil sharpener across his left wrist, and the redhead quickly ran over to Kai, yanking the blade from his fingers, and throwing it to the other side of the room.
Kai looked up at Tala, who was inspecting the damage done to Kai’s wrist, and decided that he would need bandages. Of course, he could only bandage it if his Mother actually kept a First Aid Kit in the house, and since he hadn’t seen one, he was betting that he wouldn’t be able to bandage it.
“Stay there,” he told Kai, and picked up the offending blade as he walked out of the room.
Tala went into the bathroom, and threw the blade in the bin. He then grabbed a roll of toilet tissue, and returned to Kai’s room, shutting the door behind him. Kai was running his fingers through the blood that was flowing down his arm.
“Come here,” Tala said, and Kai actually obliged, holding his arm out to Tala. “Why did you do this?”
Kai didn’t reply, but just watched as Tala dabbed the tissue at the scratches, before pressing the tissue to his wrist firmly to stop the bleeding. Tala looked at Kai’s face, and saw that his eyes seemed out of focus.
“Kai? Why do you cut yourself?” Tala asked.
Kai opened his mouth, but paused before answering.
“Because all I want…”
“… You want what?”
“… All I want is to be loved.”
A tear fell down Kai’s cheek, and Tala’s heart broke. He realised how hard it must’ve been on Kai, not having anything remotely like love his entire life. Sure, Tala’s life had been in short supply of it, too, but at least he had his Mother.
Tala pulled Kai into a hug, stroking the blue and slate hair, thinking only one thing. ‘This has to stop’.
