A Sad Goodbye

[Saw this on my very old blog and read it again (almost made me cry ;___; again]

21st March 1973

Hi, there. I’m Kaoru Nakamura. I’ll just call myself Kaoru. To anyone who had found this journal, please spread the story in it to any best friends who are having a conflict right now or then.

I have a best friend. Her name is Kouru Masamoto and I call her Kouru. Our names were almost the same. It is just the spelling which made the difference. I love this friend of mine very much even though we are very different in common. As an example, I’m a perfect girl whereas Kouru was a bit of a tomboy and loves brutality. However, she is still a kind and helpful friend who understands my feelings even though she bullies me a lot.

The both of us were as thick as thieves. There was never a single problem in between the two of us. Not until one day…

A new boy came into our university and eventually, I fell in love with him. We started dating and my dear friend Kouru was deserted. I had never realized how sad she felt even though she has other companions around her. I thought it was okay to do what I’ve done until one day, she asked me a question.

“Say… Kaoru… err… How’s the kid? Umm… I mean the guy you’re dating with… Is he okay?” she asked, stammering.

“Don’t worry, Kouru. He’s okay,” I answered. “Why… this is the first time you asked about him haven’t you?”

“Err… Yeah,” she answered back. “It’s just that… I’m sort of… worried about you.”

“Aww… You don’t have to be that way,” I said. Then, I kissed her cheek. “I’ll be okay as long as I’m with my beloved Shinta (my boyfriend). Okay?”

She nods her head and asked me to hurry before I’m late for my date. On that moment I thought she really doesn’t care about my ignorance towards her but I was wrong. Dead wrong.

3rd July 1973

It is already three months and twenty-one days since I started ignoring my friend, Kouru. The power of passionate love (Writer: Yuck!!) had over powered me. The true love from Shinta made me forgot about the world around me. It even affects my grades where it increases rapidly instead of decreasing. Well, Shinta is not like the other guys which only wanted women for fun. But, he wanted me to pay attention in class and be successful. I think this was what made me attracted to him like crazy. I thought it is okay to leave Kouru all alone until one day…

One day, I received news from one of Kouru’s friends telling that she’s sick. I felt sympathetic and asked Shinta to come together with me to pay her a visit. As I reached into her house, I met up with her adopted mother(Kouru was an orphan) and told her my intentions. I was invited into the house with a friendly manner and was brought to her room. I entered the room alone and it was jet black inside.

“Kouru?” I called out to her. There was no response. I feel about for the switches and found it at last. I saw her, sitting on her bed with a little penknife at her right hand that was directed to her left arm. I was extremely surprised and quickly snatched the penknife before she really cuts herself.

“What the heck are you trying to do!?” I asked, scolding her. “If you cut that part of your arm, you’ll die, you know.”

She kept quiet and stares at me with rebellious eyes. She stood up and pushed me away.

“Who are you!?” she asked hysterically. “I don’t know you!? Get out!!!”

“Kouru!” I cried. “It’s me, Kaoru. Your best friend! Argh! What is wrong with you!?” I asked, trying to dodge away from the things she threw.

“GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE, BETRAYER!!!!” she screamed.

I was quite surprised to hear what she had said when suddenly a hand pulls me out of the room. It was Kouru’s mother and she persuades me to go home first as Kouru is not in a very good condition. I forced myself to listen to her and dragged my feet home together with my loyal Shinta by my side.

13th October 1973

Today, I went out on an errand with Shinta. It was a day full of crowds and the streets were full of people as it was Saturday. I tried my best to dodge from the people passing by. I felt lucky as Shinta is holding on to my hand tightly to keep me in guide. I just felt sad as Kouru is not the one who is holding it as usual.

I reached home as usual and went to the kitchen to put down the groceries I had just bought. My mother asked me to go into my room instantly and I wondered why. In my room, I discovered Kouru, lying on my bed. She saw me and stood up quickly. She suddenly hugged me and whispered into my ear, “I don’t wanna be your friend anymore.”

She then walks out of my room towards the house entrance and left. I sat down in the condition of surprised and cried. “Why?” I thought. “Why? What have I done!?”

14th October 1973

I ran into her today. She apparently ignored me. I felt so sad. I don’t know what to do. So, decided to ask an advice from Shinta. He told me that he’s also feeling guilty because he had been the reason of the alienation between me and Kouru. He said that the both of us have to apologize to her. I agreed and we set up a time to meet her…. But, unfortunately, something unexpected happened on that day…

17th October 1973

I was waiting for Kouru to meet up with us on 8.00pm that night. She was ten minutes late and reached us with her body drenched with sweat.

“Quick!” she said. “There’s no time to talk. We’re in danger!”

She dragged me and Shinta to the university’s clock tower. “It’s like this,” she started explaining. “There is a gang of bad guys searching for you and this boy of yours. I bet they might be among the men you had let down and I think that they are jealous about your relationship. They told me that they wanted to kill the both of you!”

“You’ve got to be serious, Kouru,” said Shinta. “This is no fun.”

“Why the heck should I lie to the two of you?” she cried. “By the way, it was you who took Kaoru from me. So, YOU are the evil villain here.”

“Why you…!”

Then, suddenly the gangsters entered the clock tower and without any warning, Kouru attacked them. I gasped in horror, seeing the violence happening in front of me. It was too unbearable to be watched, especially when your own best friend is the victim.

Kouru had defeated almost all of them except one. She seemed to have a little problem fighting with him, maybe because she’s already tired. Shinta and I weren’t able to do anything as she had threat us. But, when she almost falls of the tower, Shinta started to get into action. He hit the gangster at the neck and made him faint but, it was too late for him to grab Kouru’s clinging hand as she had slipped because of the pouring rain. We gasped in horror and rushed down to inspect her condition.

We reached the last flight of stairs and rushed outside into the rain. Then, there I sawher, lying down, lifeless. There was blood everywhere.

“KOURU!!!!” I shout out of grief. I ran to her side and clutched her. “KOURU! KOURU!!!!!”

I looked into her face and saw her eyes slowly opening.

“Kouru!?” I called out to her. She smiled and touched my face.

“Quite a terrible way to commit suicide, huh?” she said, weakly.

“Commit suicide!?” I asked, demandingly. “What do you mean by that!?”

“Hmph… I’m just kidding,” she answered weakly. “Don’t be too naive.”

I felt my eyes watering. “Kouru,” I said. “Both Shinta and I wanted to apologize for our feeling less act. He’s sorry for bringing the alienation between the two of us and I… I’m sorry… for ignoring you. I’m so sorry. We’re so sorry. Please forgive us.”

She smiled again pulled my face slowly to hers. She, then kissed my forehead and said, “It’s okay. I had long forgiven you both. It’s just that…” she reached for Shinta’s hand and attached it to mine’s. She then, continued. “It’s just that I want the both of you to be together… Forever… Shinta, look after her properly, please.”

“Mark my words, Kouru,” Shinta answered. “I’ll never leave her side.”

“I’m glad to hear that…” she said. She looked into the sky and smiled.

“I finally get to meet with you guys again,” she said in a low, almost unheard voice.It seemed like she is not talking to us, but she’s talking to the ‘thing’ she’s seeing in the sky. She held out her hand to the sky and her breath sounded like it’s getting out of her body. She then, died in my clutches, peacefully, smiling.

18th October 1973

After attending Kouru’s funeral, I returned home. However, I still regretted the wrong I had done. I cried as much as I can and in my heart, I prayed for her spirit’s peace.