HeLP!!

hello everyone. i have a bit of a problem im afraid.....i very much would like to enter this contest on Deviant Art its a poetry contest... you need to write a poem about your first minuits as a vampire... and.. i dont now if what i worte is good enough i have written 2 poems within the last 7 hours.. aha :] i need yur comments on all of them... i will post every singal one thati think is at least knda good for this contest...... i have until the 30 of this month... withc leave me exactily 30 days fromtoday... well that is all.. so please comment and be BRUTAL.! -not to brutal tho aha :]- okay tahnks guys
Amaya-V. p.s to lazy to post more today :D

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