Big Day..Not the Good Kind, Either.

So today is my oral surgery for my wisdom teeth and my boyfriend's court date. My head is full of worry, but I think everything will be all right. I really miss Brandon and wish I could be there with him today, but I have to get these stupid wisdom teeth out. The sooner the better because they really hurt my mouth. I am looking forward to tomorrow because he's coming to see me, along with Kaylee, my bestest friend ever. Those 2 really complete my life. I don't know where I'd be without them. Kaylee has gotten me through so much and Brandon is seriously the most sweetest guy I that I have ever met. I'm not looking forward to being drugged up the next 3 days, but I don't want to feel any pain. I'll try to get more posts in later though.

This Song. x_x

This song fits my emotions exactly when I "lose myself" or when I get depressed and have no idea what to do. This song is just perfect. I am so glad I found it. I don't really like her voice that much in this song, but the lyrics are wonderful.

New Vehicle :3

So today my mom is getting her Grand Am, so this means I get her Blazer. I'm freaking excited. I'm going to clean the crap out of that thing and get it fixed up and whatnot because in the summer I really want to use it for camping, because the back is big enough to set up a bed in it and everything. Roooaaad trips! lol. I'm really looking forward to it. Then I'll actually have a trunk I can keep stuff in without worrying that it'll get ruined, because in my car, the trunk is leaky so it gets wet in there. X_X. I'm just really excited to have a bigger vehicle. I've always, ALWAYS wanted a truck, van or something like the blazer (hatchback). I hope I get my tax return soon, but I don't expect to get that back for a week or two, which really sicks. That's what I'm going to use to fix up the blazer. It needs a muffler or something to make it more quiet and it needs a new tire and that's about it. Probably needs an oil change, too. I'm just really excited for the blazer. :3. Eeep. :3

Thinkingg.

Today has been rather boring but relaxing. I need to be doing the homework that I have. I have a LOT of it. I'm not really looking forward to school this week, but when am I? haha. I'm pretty worried even though I don't feel it. I know that's what I'm supposed to feel, but it's not very strong which is probably the medicine's fault. If that makes sense. I am worried about Brandon, but I'm not entirely sure what to do about it. He has this thing coming up that is kind of a big deal. Not just kind of, but a really big deal. .. I just keep thinking to myself that everything happens for a reason. Everything. It's all fate and it'll all work itself out eventually. I have to keep telling myself that about myself too. With this anxiety and medicine. Both of which have been a really big pain in the ass. Especially as of right now because I'm feeling rather numb to just about everything, but I have so many thoughts that need to come out. As usual. It's just getting harder and harder everyday to express them and even be able to get the words out. Regardless of everything that has been going on, I just feel like everything is going to be alright. Which is unusual for me because I always have doubts atleast about something. Right now I'm missing Brandon and I can't stop thinking about him. Pretty crazy haha.

Sick...Bleh

I figured after Thursday night I would have felt better and wasn't going to get sick anymore, but I didn't eat anything at all Friday because I just didn't feel good. I personally think it was a good choice lol. Once I got into the little town my boyfriend lives in my nerves were settled a lot more than before, but I was still sick. Bleh. It wasn't so bad, but it was still really awkward for me. He was lucky I even talked as much as I did and whatnot. I really don't like people~they make me super nervous. xO. I also almost got sick there, too. I was dry heaving, because I hadn't eaten anything at all to puke up. I was thankful for that. I'd rather that than actually throw up food XD. Sick. Anyways, he was very sweet about it, and I can't even tell you how good it made me feel. Not even my mom cared all that much when I was sick. She probably did once I was much younger, but I don't remember at all. I have a bad memory. I am so exhausted right now. I hope that tonight I won't puke (because I did eat today)because I would really like a good night of sleep. It's much needed. I am sad, though. I don't want to sleep alone tonight. I hate sleeping alone, but I will have to deal. I am looking forward to a day of rest, even though I really wish I could see Brandon tomorrow. And the next day. Annnd everyday. haha. I'm silly. Probably because I'm damn tired and need to sleep, but I have so much feeling to get out because I'm used to telling my mom everything, but I can't. So I'm letting it all out on here. I also realize that I need to be posting more cards and wallpapers and such on here. I have been lacking on that and very lazy. I may or may not get to that tomorrow. I figure that I have nothing better to do, but sometimes I get smacked in the face with plans I don't ever expect. Gah, okay. My eyes buuurrrn like crazy from the exhaustion. Hopefully I can post cards and such on here tomorrow and maybe blog a little more. x).

Byyyeee.