Hello to my friends, enemies, and newcomers. ^^ I'm glad you decided to drop by in my world. Hope you didn't hurt yourself.
Yeah I barely update here but you can catch me on MyO a whole lot more if you want to know. ^.^
Also catch me on myspace, facebook, and twitter, but you just got to find me first ^_~
~~Avatar credits belong to ElluMellu on DevArt~~
I haven't had such a creepy nightmare in a long time that made me scared to go back to sleep. But last night I dreamed that our school was attacked by zombies o_O Not your ordinary zombies, those deadspace ones.
Like that one eating him...
Me and some of my softball teammates were the last survivors and I was running around when I got surrounded. Then I woke up... I actually woke up multiple times but I went back to the same dream -_- So I walked around and slept in my dad's room til school.
Scurry...
Well... I had enough of living in this place. All it's brought me is grief, sour memories, and regrets. I'm 18 yet my dad is controlling me without even noticing it himself. He says I can speak my mind but when I do, he says it's attitude and sass. He takes all my money for bills but puts strings attached on me, but then turns around and accuses me of attaching strings on him. Then when we have a financial agrument, he says he can pay bills without me and that I was really nothing but pocket money (Does $350 sound like pocket money to you?). I work my ass off to pay bills and help the family but all I get is dirty dishes and crap thrown back into my face. He put us into this mess but getting all optimistic and trusting businessmen so well, when they just lead him into a endless web of lies. I work my ass off so hard to get over 300 dollars every 2 weeks, just to get thrown into debt thats over 400 dollars because of charges and advances my dad made. I've had enough of these people and their tainted minds. I want to get out before I kill myself. I came so close today. Tasted the bleach, but didn't go for the whole mess... then I had to face a stupid bitch out from my dad. Just put scratches on the arm and legs the whole time, dug my fingernails into my skin. I was always a coward to harm myself... but there's a start for everything.
I kinda hate it though. Me and my dad use to be best friends, one of my closest friends. Guess we grew tired of each other. Guess I hated him for changing so much. He went from so caring and kind to showing how he's so hateful, prejudice, and two-faced.. all in a snap.
I wanted to move to a dorm during the summer, it seemed reasonable and he would understand. Now I look at it, we get into agruments almost twice a week. He fusses at me over the stupidiest things. Then I get so upset that I inch closer to suicide each time. I acutally write a suicide letter in my head for later. Plus, as he said, the distance grows bigger each argument. Isn't it a good idea to move out now while I'm still in the Christmas holidays? I plan on talking to my half-brother about moving to his place in Lafayette, Louisiana... if it does happen, my dad will probably never speak to me again. My half brother may say no, try to help, but that will only make it worse between me and my dad. Then my dad may try to ship me to my mom's house in Florida... but she can barely take care of herself though.
Guess I'll see where Fate takes me...
IT'S SNOWING! *runs in circles in the snow* OMG I seriously wish my camera was working! It's so beautiful ;;
I called the school to see if it was cancelled and the principal answered personally saying that it was not cancelled... I got soooo upset and I hung up and threw the phone down; I made sure to curse him out even though he didn't hear me. I'm sure he felt it. I mean, all the counties around us, and even the community college down the the street cancelled! He doesn't want to cancel because of a stupid Christmas program thats today! Makes me so angry, that I stayed home.
I can feel the affects... I can't feel my toes...
**EDIT**
Everyone around is losing power and its a matter of time til we lose ours...
I was trying so hard to upload my other 2 pictures yesterday but theo wouldn't respond to it. Just says I need to upload the image when I did. >< Then I tried to move it to a shared file where I can get it from another computer but then when I moved it the pictures got deleted, so I moved it back, but then the whole folder just disappeared...
