Black and Smoke

Standing by an open window
I heard the singing of the great river
It was a new voice I recognized as my own

A memory of when I found you in the green forest
I broke through rough pines and walked through the stones in clear water
Thought you were a traveler too

We were under different obligations that couldn't be met
You took my apples so I settled with a pear

That angered me so fires burnt your bones and your blood painted the rivers black
the smoke arose into the noses of angels in the clouds
your essence cracked like the sound of whips

Mirage of Life

It's been so long since those times, when you were still in my solemn life, where you kept me company through the harshness of the breaking winter wind. I can argue that my life felt even more crystal clear and with a brighter future than the reflection of the sun on the ocean while sitting on the horizon. But, all that changed when you left me that day in the beach that soon turned into desert. While I felt the scorching heat hit my skin I missed you more than the water I held a dying thirst for and I kept telling myself that with a sight of your perfect eyes I'd quench my thirst and rehabilitate my health once again.. I thought I was lost as I wondered through the thousand grains of sand and the wind of despair beat me back with cutting blades of rocks and sand. I mourned over my dying body until I saw a miraculous oasis waiting for me simply requesting me to imbibe myself in the sweet smelling fresh water I could already imagine tasting. I began to take faster steps and surprisingly found myself in all this confusion running towards such miracle. There, from a considerable distance I saw a figure next to the oasis of life and survival. I saw you, after all the time you had abandoned me,and I had grown in hatred of you in my journey but now my emotions were changed. I didn't care anymore but as I got closer everything became began to fade away with the wind. I could see it and I could smell it and I dived to save the image from going away. Sadly it wasn't real... and I had to no way to make what I had seen real. What the oasis had become was nothing but an empty grave only missing me. In the middle of this fruitless desert the arid land called my life was the setting for my end after you over-harvested everything that held my fertile nature and created everything into inane thoughts of this twisted world that won't piece up together and only classify me as schizophrenic.

Deviant Art Picture by:
Snow Myth

Hell and Her Book

I walk with a light limp.. my foot hurts.. I've injured it while running today.
Early while the cool October wind blew in my face.
I walk and the classroom is empty.. nothing really there for me.
I walk right on ahead though the bright lights shinning of my glasses hurt my eyes. I ignore the slight pain though and I notice that as I'm walking I can't help but stare down at the ground. The pain in my foot distracts me more than the light. Usually I'd try to close my eyes a little more to prevent light to break inside. I seem to not care.. and the stress is bothering me.. back inside my mind.. I keep thinking about every morning how I wake up and wash my face. Then I look in the mirror and wash my hair a little bit... then I look at my hands and it makes me sad when I see that I'm losing a lot of hair. I pretend its not true though and I shave. Now, I'm inside this classroom now and I see shelves of books and as I'm walking down I notice a certain book. Inferno by Dante. Then I remember her... "Melissa.." I whisper to myself softly. I wonder if she ever gets to die will I still love her enough to go to hell and get her back? "No" a voice in my head tells me and I seem to agree. Such a beautiful nurse she's become right now.. simply an intern in College. I wonder what I was in love with.. her looks or the way she neglected me. Both, probably I love being treated bad by the people I feel strongly infatuated to. I miss her smiles and I counted the times she let me get close to her... all those times I felt some of the most perfect feelings in my life. Delicate... I thought her skin was too delicate so I had enough self control not to try hugging her or even restrain from letting the kiss be a sin. It would never be anything serious and all I ever do is make her feel a light warmth in her hear. She often told me how no one would tell her the things I did.. I wondered if her blush filled face was that bright or brighter when she spoke to other people but I refused to believe that there was someone else.. someone better than me. She was my upperclassmen though and the day her graduation came mine was still far from sight. That's the last day I ever heard about her.. and I can only dream about her now. Her soft innocent looks on her face.. and my beating bleeding heart in her hands.. oh how beautiful she looks in that nurse uniform. Ironic.. her profession she's going for is heart surgeon. So that day she took my heart and never gave it back. Now I break hearts only to feel like I have my own.

When Time Stays Still

I smile and tell you I'm a vampire and now it's your turn to die my love.

The Bright Side

"I am who I am"
Lucifer told me.
"I am who I am"
A girl named Lucy told me.
I wish I could see the light.
I wish I could see the bright side.
and so what's the moon without the sun?
Without the light there wouldn't be a bright side.
I'm in love that's for sure. With who? Myself who else is there??
Oh God please don't forget about me... I know you don't but please I need to blame.
I've noticed now that the light and the dark don't always have a bright side.
Why don't people die from happiness instead of sadness?
Why is the color of passion red and not blue?
Why do you have a soul while I seem to have misplaced mine?
Why do you have to die while I have to watch?
I'm dedicated to see.. I'm dedicated to die..
so many lives I've wasted with one time line...
I'm strong and won't drown I'm proud and I won't sink.
I'm sad but I can't cry.. I'm a bottle waiting to burst.
Champagne... to celebrate my fall it'll resemble me when I burst.
Fire.. is what I am.. The dimmest light in the dark..
The destruction that touches the sky with black smoke..
The beginning of life through rebirth..
The phoenix who lives forever and dies forever..
A vampire in love like fire burns and without a true lover he's dead.
So... what threat am I to Lucifer..?
Have I just realized how much of a demon I am?
Black wings and a coat..?
Red halo and destruction from the death I cause..?
I refuse to father the son of someone else.. the fruit of sin
the purity of life through sinful birth...
I wish to know who I really am.. because I have no memories until I became this age... nothing worth talking about no pain and no happiness.. just plain boring apathy its the equality of such a boring death called an overdose... I'd rather fall and break my bones under the shallow river water under the bridge.. too bad its not my time and I can never die..