Welcome, friends! This is basically my life update world, where I pour all the crap going on in my life at the moment. I don't expect people to give this place much attention, to be honest. Well, make yourself at home, anyway!

Unwelcome Guests

So, one of my Mom's cousins (I hesitate to call her my own) is staying at our house for a couple of days. I do not like her very much. No, in fact, I don't like her at all. So, what I planned to do is this:
I'll hide away in my room and play Katawa Shoujo and watch Game Grumps until she leaves.
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I mean, what else can I do? I don't want to talk to her, see her, or even be in the same room as her at all.


That aforementioned doctors appointment is in three days ;w; I'm so, so, so nervous! Oh my gosh! I figured I must be nervous because I'd have to talk to a stranger about my health and body... uuugh, I hate being this way! But, anyway, I went with my Mom to her work and helped her - she's a cleaning lady at a motel. She had a lot of rooms to clean yesterday, so she brought me along to speed up the process. I was happy to oblige, because my Mom has a bad back and knee, and she always comes home so tired and in pain. It was difficult, because I wasn't used to working that hard, but I did it, and I'm feeling extremely proud of myself. I'm also feeling extremely proud of my mother, because she does such a hard job each day on her own, and with her bad back and knee! I really wish she'd quit, but I know we need the money. Anyhow, I'll come back and tell you how the doctor's visit goes in a couple of days~

A Little Anxious

I was talking to Mom about my anxiety the day before yesterday. This is the first time I've really talked about it with anyone other than my sister. I was very relieved to find that she understood more that I thought she would, however she made a suggestion that leaves me with mixed feelings. She suggested that we, perhaps, talk with my doctor about anxiety medication. That's something I don't really know how I feel about. I mean, I'm willing to try anything once, and if it helps then that could really help me with getting a job... so, I don't really know what I'm nervous about. Maybe it's the talking to the doctor part? Does anyone else get nervous about doctor visits? Well, I'll let you know how it goes, if we end up going.

I'm Gonna Do It!!

I've been thinking about this for a while, and as anxious as it makes me, I can't live this way forever. I'm going to have my Mom help me apply for a job. One cannot hope to move forward if they do not push for progress! And, even though this directly challenges my social anxiety, and I don't believe I'm strong enough to handle it at this moment, I have to do something. My Mom, with her bad back, is in so much pain these days. I can't stand to see her that way. I have to pick up my own slack, because nobody is going to do it for me. Now, there's just the matter of getting Mom alone, so I can discuss it with her ^^;

(I'm not comfortable discussing these things with my dad/in his presence.)


I've been doing a lot more house work than normal uou I'm really tired...
And as the Texas summer advances, it's getting warmer and warmer... Even on a chilly night like this, it's blazing hot in my house -o-;
Anyway, my sisters over, and I plan to have a good time. Lets hope it ends up that way.