Irrational Hate

I really need confirmation right now.
If not I might lose my mind again.

I am starting to hate who I am, and I should'nt. It's all because of Verny Vern and her biased concept of personality. I am ashamed of who I am, and I feel like I can do nothing but sit in the bathroom and drown in my own blood.

Aside from that, this day is too slow. I need to eat and do some chores. After that I hope I get some sleep.
I really want to hurt some people in this school, if only I could. I desperately need to go to Mock Trial tomorrow, I'm bored and irritated. Instead of forcing myself to laugh it off, I'll just ride it out; don't worry I won't slit my wrists. I wish I could get some sleep, and I thankfully got some since school was delayed once again (Even though it should'nt have been).

Most eventful part of today is that I have to do this assignment in English. We have to enter a poem and an essay for this contest; winner gets grants for college and stuff...At first it was optional, and I didn't think I should because I am a sucky writer, but now I have to. I was thinking about entering "The Hidden Monsters Within" (If it fit the qualifications) but I don't really want to. Don't want to have to pull up my account and stuff, don't want people in my business. Instead I'm making this other one called "Blend". I hope it'll be worthy of something; I don't know what I'm going to do the essay on. I was thinking that I was gonna do it on a tragedy sparked from ignorance and hate. No, not the death of Marcus Jones. I'm finished 'grieving' him, but I still hope his sould, God rest it, is at peace.

Still. I hate my school, I hate the people I'm around, I hate the way my Uncle's mother talks to me, and I hate alot of other things.
But that hate does not corrupt my thinking. I've crunched yet another song (for some reason, my iPod is messed up) and I hope I can make it this worlds' theme...But it is probably too extreme for a PG-13 site. I doubt it, though, I PM'd Adam and he should give me the Yay or Ne on it.

Whatever.
Only hold love for Jesus and y'all.
And my mother and father.
Enjoy the rest of your days.

End