Im up at 4 am so forgive any mistakes.
I've been busy doing so many other projects, its easy to forget this place even exists.
Strange since Ive been on theotaku since I was about 17.
It might be longer now that I think of it.I doubt alot of my friends are still here.
I look back at my art thinking to my self I was really bad.
looking back on how bad I was is good for me though. Alot of my art blocks have been just me being to stubborn to draw something.
I havent lost the want to draw, but alot of my goals, like animation and stuff. While I could physically do it, Im not really willed to do it.
Alot of work goes into it, Ive been practicing animation.I got the whole timing thing down.
So I guess theres nothing but actually doing the work to do.That's where there is a problem.
I don't know if it would be worth it. I haven't had any success. I am 22 and jobless. I dont have a drivers license nor do I like where I live. Im so glad I don't listen to Emo music anymore.XD I think perhaps that would be ilfitting for my mood.
Im really sad, but Im not depressed, Im just tired of failing.
I dont feel like doing anything with a great degree of work, cause I dont know if itll even be seen.And of course the fact Ive grown distant to my online communities Only makes that feeling worse.
Anyway I may need to get some sleep, I maybe accidentally giving to much of my gloomy side out right now because it happpens to be where my head is.Im not all Sad and depressing.I do alot, and am getting attention.Music Art you name it. I do kinda hype myself up as Im doing a special piece,whether it be a song or art piece, so when it doesnt do that much better then normal, I feel a bit down.Like if Final fantasy failed to save Square soft.For me its not really that drastic, I just shouldnt expect to finally get success from one song or art piece. I gotta get some small victories going so I can will myself up.