Guilt Trip

Was just a simple ‘hello’ too much to ask for? Danny hadn’t been accustomed to Senshi’s off-and-on appearances yet but he sure as hell knew that he was always up to no good when he came around. Mattaki Senshi truly rivaled Danny’s abilities with him having super speed as well as strength. It was an uncanny feeling knowing that someone with such similar capabilities was there to steal his spotlight one day. As usual Senshi spoke in a clear and articulate tone of voice. “ You know Daniel, I went to see Jay the other day.”

Danny’s interest piqued immediately. Jay was sent to the infirmary about a week ago for putting herself in danger with an E2 Regime Fighter. The poor girl had taken a toll when she was stabbed in the stomach by its iron blade before Danny had gone to decapitate its parts to destroy it. He wasn’t allowed to see her for a few more days because of a few errand missions he had to run alone but, hearing that his rival Senshi was able to visit her before him had sparked a sudden mix of both jealousy and fear that made him go rigid.

“ She is getting better. Do not worry about it. She wants you to go on ahead without her and focus on your priorities. But you know what? While you are gone I will be more than happy to take good care of her.” His smile had an unfriendly kind of warmth to it. “ You stay away from her Senshi. I don’t want you any where near her.”

“ And why is that? What are you afraid of?”

Danny paused. He knew where this was going. Senshi always turned things against him and hit him emotionally when it came to Jay. He knew very well that Senshi had taken an interest to her when he first arrived at the Alliance Station and she too had felt a connection to him as well. Sometimes on their days off Senshi would approach Jay a bit too casually then he should and the two of them would spend a lot of time together talking amongst themselves. They were starting to become good friends, too good of friends to Danny’s liking. He remembered her saying ‘ I’m glad that I finally found someone just like me who understands exactly how I feel with being misunderstood by normal people. I’m glad that I have someone like him there for me when I need him’.

Yes, she seemed to confide in him more and more often with a lot of her problems and secrets. He wished so badly that he wouldn’t show up whenever things between the two of them would get rocky. Unfortunately, he always did and he was the first person she would go to. He hated it; it was a malicious stab to the heart.

“ You are jealous, are you not? You have to cope with the fact that I too have feelings for her. The two of you are not even a real couple now are you?”

Sadly, this was true. They had never done anything normal couples would do. They were always preoccupied with their jobs and a relationship between the two of them would only cause trouble because of their partnership. They had no real time to intimately spend together and he wished that he were able to change that. He had every right to be jealous of Senshi because he was able to pull a few strings around to his favor. He spoke again more fervently now that he had Danny’s full attention. “ I think it would be better off if she were with me Daniel. You should let her go, for your own sake.”

“No. I can’t and I won’t. I love her no matter how much you twist her mind into thinking that I don’t.”

Senshi stood quietly and nodded. “ If you say so, you’re going to regret it though. She might not return your feelings anymore.” He turned on his heels and walked off with those final words. Something clicked in Danny’s head at that moment. If he really cared for her he would have to show her that he really meant it to change her mind. He headed in the opposite direction. He was going to go see her himself.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Jay had been sleeping a few moments earlier. Her dreams however had suddenly awoken her leaving her face dripping in cold sweat. She had remembered what happened to her and the painful memory gripped at her stomach again and again when she recalled it. The last Regime Fighter had one of her comrades in a firm grip, nearly crushing the poor man until she had saved him herself. She was able to free him by taking out the clawed hand that held him but what she didn’t see coming up from behind her could have killed her. It was an unfair stabbing on her part. Another robot had snuck up behind her and gave her a clean cut through and through with its jagged blade. Then, things went blank. She hadn’t remembered much after that except for the blood, the dismembered robot, and… Was it Danny who had saved her? She may have recalled a face looming over her, his eyes filled with panic and worry but the image was blurred. Could it have been Senshi? Ever since he had joined their part of the squad he had vowed to protect her. Maybe it was him? She was very unsure of herself. Both images of their faces hovered in her mind. She screwed her eyes shut trying to remember and then a light tap on the door had drawn her attention back to subconscious ness. “ You can come in, Senshi.” It had to be him. Maybe he could clear things up for her.

It was Danny. “ Hey.” He walked in with a little bouquet of flowers that he held at his side. He smiled gently but Jay could immediately see the hurt in his eyes upon mentioning Senshi’s name. She frowned. “ Oh, I’m sorry. I just thought you were-“

“ I know.” He finished. “ He told me he comes here often. It’s no problem.” It was a problem; she felt guilty now, leaving an awkward pause in their conversation. He placed the flowers in the empty vase next to her bed and kneeled next to her. He studied her for a moment taking in everything that had happened a week ago. “ I can’t believe this happened to you Jay. I’m so sorry I was too late.”

“ It’s not your fault. I should have been more careful that’s all. I was too slow to see it coming. I wasn’t on my best guard.”

He cringed a little. He didn’t like it when she put the blame on herself, especially when she was the one being hurt. To be honest he had seen it coming before she had but he wasn’t able to move quick enough to get her out of the way. He put a gentle hand to her face and stroked her cheek. She looked so weak and helpless lying in the little hospital bed. Her forehead and several parts of her arms and legs were wrapped in gauze. A few bruises could also be seen here and there and most of her stomach was bandaged up. Despite her casualties her angelic face still held its usual softness. She was a fighter and he was proud of her for that. “ I was surprised that you came to see me. I thought you would have been busy again.” Her eyes turned downcast. “ I was able to take some time off. I had your brother take over today’s shift. I really needed to see you.”

She smiled. “ I’m glad. I don’t see you very often anymore. We don’t spend time together; we don’t talk to each other very much. When I got in here and you didn’t show up to see me I would have thought that you didn’t care about me anymore. Senshi thought so too.” Tears weld up in the corners of her eyes and she looked away from him.

Poor Jay. He had only been keeping his distance from her for a little while so that he could focus on his missions but he hadn’t realized how much it hurt her to stay away. No wonder why she had depended so much on Senshi while he wasn’t around. She was lonely.

“ I’m sorry Jay. I didn’t mean to hurt you by leaving you alone like that. I thought that you’d be fine but look what’s happened to you. I’m glad that I was able to rush you here before it was too late.” She turned to stare at him. It was Danny? He saved her? She had thought that he was too preoccupied to have noticed the attack but it was him who had come to her rescue. “ You saved me?” The thought was too good to be true. The tears began to stream down her face. Danny was suddenly confused. “ Why wouldn’t I have saved you? You’re my partner, I wouldn’t just leave you there.” His eyebrows knit in frustration. “How could you think that I would leave you?” She looked away from him again, embarrassed by his question. He squeezed her hand gently to get her attention. “ I love you so much Jay, more than you may be thinking. Senshi has been telling you differently hasn’t he?”

She nodded apologetically looking back into his eyes. “ Don’t listen to what he says. He’s been lying to you.”

“Not entirely. Most of the things he’s told me are true.” She narrowed her eyes. “ Don’t tell me he’s a liar.” She released her hand from his grip. “ He told me that you avoided me because having a relationship with your partner would be unethical and that it would only cause trouble.”

“I’ve never said that.” He had thought it at one time though. “ He told me that sometimes I would get on your nerves and that sometimes you wished you had chosen someone else to be your partner.”

“ I haven’t said that either.” That had also been another one of his rude thoughts. Was Senshi reading his mind? He knew that some CMA’s were mind readers but he was quite sure that Senshi didn’t have that ability. When Danny grew quiet Jay replied, “ I knew it. He was telling the truth.” Danny became frustrated again. “ Listen, I may have thought some things before but I don’t really mean them. We get mad at each other sometimes don’t we? We say things we don’t mean when that happens. I’m sure everyone does, right?” He searched her emerald eyes for an answer. “ Yes.”

“Honestly, I can’t stand being away from you. I’ve been forcing myself back this whole time but I can’t stop myself from seeing you.” He felt his face grow hot with his uncontrollable frustration. Jay sat up from her bed and wrapped her arms around his neck. Danny relaxed, letting his head rest on her shoulder. “ It’s okay Danny. I believe you.” She whispered. He wrapped his arms around her waist being careful not to hurt her in the process, lifted his head up and leaned in to kiss her. She was more than happy to return it, finally realizing how much he truly loved her.

End