Hi I'm Dranzerstorm
You may remember me as a regular contestant on the caption battle contest.
Welcome to Retro Retrospective, my world dedicated to the old guard of the Otaku world; expect some reviews of the old & obscure, and in-depth geeky knowledge with the occasional top ten and I now have a logo.

Little info about me
Well I'm British and I'm in to all things animated and nostalgia.
I've grown up with every cartoon going and have watched hundreds of anime.
Oh and to answer a question I was asked once, no I don't wear glasses in real life, I would wear Loke's sunglasses though.

Top 10 Insufferable Miracle Rookies

The term "Miracle Rookie" refers to a character who suddenly becomes an instant expert at anything despite having no training or any experience in the task they are doing, a lot of them are annoying Mary Sue types who usually have the added bonus of being the show's main problem solver. So on to the list, I have a few choice words about these characters as well.

Dishonorable Mentions

Yui Hirasawa from K-On
Most of her so called Guitar work maybe from Autism as Yui demonstrates symptoms of Hyper Focus where she can focus and master anything at the cost of forgetting something else. Autism is not an excuse to go on this list.
Kazuya Aoi from Freezing
Can somehow control Satellizer after meeting her once, justified as he's the brother of a stronger character.
Ichika Orimura from Infinite Stratos
The same can be said for Ichika who also has a more famous sister who is a master of her craft.

10. Ash Ketchum from Pokemon
Rated low as he never wins the Pokemon League but it doesn't excuse the fact that he seems to make friends with everyone he meets and somehow wins respect of all legendary Pokemon. For a normal trainer that doesn't happen.

9. Negi Springfield from Negima
Doesn't seem limited by the fact that he's only ten, in fact he spends so much time acting out of age that you don't see the same character you started with and he seemingly achieves all this without any effort.

8. Uzumaki Naruto from Naruto
From Mastering clone jutsu after reading one scroll to being Ninja Jesus, Naruto seems to do an Ash and befriend everyone he meets and seems to be stronger than even the strongest characters in the anime.

7. Minato Sahashi from Sekirei
Gets dragged into the whole Sekirei story by accident and suddenly commands a harem of super powered girls. Then starts being all high and mighty about saving all the Sekirei.

6. Saito Hiraga from Familiar of Zero
Gets sucked into a new world and suddenly masters everything from swords to piloting World War II fighter jets and turns the nobility cycle upside down in the process, the only reason he's not higher is because I actually feel sorry for him having to spend his days with Louise.

5. Madoka Kaname from Madoka Magica
Much of the story is about preventing her from becoming a Magical Girl but no matter how you look at it, she's still insufferable as a character and her final form makes Naruto's achievements look like nothing.

4. Akane Isshiki from Vividred Operation
I do like this series but I find Akane annoying, she seems to command everything with ease and makes friends instantly without even trying, if the series were a bit longer and had some development it would be excused but the rush in getting to the climax makes Akane too perfect as a character and it's irritating.

3. Misaki Suzuhara from Angelic Layer
She invented the term Miracle Rookie, Misaki somehow gets dragged into the Angelic Layer game but somehow manages to win nearly all her battles by a mixture of luck or convenient wrestling moves she saw her friend perform. It doesn't help that her angel Hikaru can take a huge pounding and still stand and counter with something stronger that finishes off her opponent in one hit. The balance of powers in this anime is like a fighting character with a million cheat codes.

2. Kamille Bidan from Zeta Gundam
All he had to do was shrug off an insult from a Titans Pilot and we could've avoided the whole Zeta Gundam series. While most Gundam pilots starting out, find themselves in this position, Kamille is the worst offender of this. Unlike the other people on this list who are kind and pariahs of benevolence, Kamille is a complete utter ass hole who thinks he has the god given right to preach to everyone, no wonder people punch him so much.

1. Yoshika Miyafuji from Strike Witches
But this girl almost made Strike Witches unwatchable. Yoshika seems to defy logic in this series, how is it that a young girl whose only talent is healing and creating barriers somehow seems to do better than veteran witches in this war going to the point of solving every problem and effectively leading the 501st Strike Witches despite not being an actual leader and then seemingly smiles all the time thinking everything is okay and cheery when countries are being destroyed by rogue aliens. Seriously it's irritating.

Cartoon Vault: Sally Bollywood

I'm back from my illness, so lets get back to it with Sally Bollywood.

Sally Bollywood is about a secret agent of the same name, going around the multicultural city of Cosmopolis solving mysteries alongside her cyber expert friend Doowee MacAdam, although the majority of these mysteries are school level problems and apparently not only is this show five years old but it has over hundred episodes.
Lets address the main theme of this show which is of course Bollywood, now Bollywood is the term used to describe India's film industry made up of epic dance numbers with hundreds of dancers led by a male or female lead, it's lots of fun to watch however looking at this, despite having creation credits from India, the Bollywood levels are rather tame, in fact the whole series is rather tame as most episodes follow a samey formula of Scooby Doo crossed with Kim Possible minus ghosts and effort. It doesn't help that Sally comes across as being a little too perfect which brings me to a serious complaint about shows with female leads along with girls cartoons in general is that female leads don't always showcase weakness which makes them hard to relate to.
Overall the show is harmless enough and is worth a look but don't expect anything spectacular.

I'm Sick

Apologies for the lack of content in the last week as I've been ill.

I hope to be typing again soon, there's more cartoons to come for the Vault including Ed Edd & Eddy, Denver the Last Dinosaur and Sally Bollywood, while over on Fantasy Zone, UAFC will host a Super Smash Bros special of five battles in a row.
If I'm okay tomorrow, expect some posts.
See ya later.

Cartoon Vault: Clutch Cargo

Now it's time for a history lesson as we move onto a really old and creepy looking cartoon called Clutch Cargo.

Clutch Cargo is about a pilot of the same name, who travels around the world on dangerous assignments alongside a tag-a-long kid named Spinner, a Dachshund dog named Paddlefoot and a scruffy man named Swampy, there isn't much else to work on in terms of plot, it's very much the most basic version of Johnny Quest you're ever going to get, so lets discuss the one thing Clutch Cargo is infamous for which is Syncro-Vox.
Syncro-Vox is a filming method which combines static images with moving images, in terms of animation, lips are super imposed on the character's faces in order to save money on animating full moveable lips. Animation was very expensive in the late 50s with only Disney, Metro Goldwyn Mayer & Warner Bros having the budget for any significant cartoons at the time. Clutch Cargo was developed by a relatively small company and had to cut corners everywhere but weren't savvy enough to use the Hanna Barbara methods of cost cutting or the mostly robot era of anime post the first Astroboy anime released ironically the same year as Clutch Cargo.
The result of this was dodgy looking animation where vocal dialogue scenes were done with still images and looked insanely creepy especially when Spinner & Paddlefoot was voiced by a woman.
What saved this cartoon from failure is that the stories were pretty decent and easily digestible as the episodes were only five minutes long and one story arc would take up all the days in the Weekdays with a full recap at the Weekend.
So despite the obvious flaws in it's production, Clutch Cargo was a surprising success in it's era and at least gave an example to other animators of what can happen when budgets are too tight.
Syncro-Vox still has a small place in today's media as a method used for sketch show shorts and has even found moderate success with webtoon Annoying Orange.

Cartoon Vault: Mighty Ducks

I've been doing some clean up on Retro Retrospective and unfortunately the Top 100 cartoons project has been cancelled, but to make up for it I shall review five cartoons to send into the Vault, starting with Disney's Ice Hockey venture, Mighty Ducks.

First a little history; Mighty Ducks originally began as a live action film in 1992 about an out of luck Ice Hockey team becoming champions under the command of a former pee-wee player, turned lawyer named Gordon Bombay (Emilio Estevez) who only ended up in this position because of community service which happened because he was drink driving. The film was a surprising commercial success and a year later an actual NHL Ice Hockey team named the Anaheim Mighty Ducks was formed under Disney ownership. Disney sold the team in 2005 and the team actually won the Stanley Cup the following season; in between that time in 1996 the cartoon series came about which was interesting so to speak.
It begins on a distant winter planet called Puckworld, whose inhabitants are not only humanoid ducks but their lives are centered around Ice Hockey. The peace is then broken by the Saurians who escape a place called Dimensional Limbo and lay waste to Puckworld as part revenge, part conquest led by Lord Dragaunus.
A resistance group led by Canard Thunderbeak battles bravely but ends up on the brink of defeat as Canard ends up trapped in Dimensional Limbo, assumed dead. In a desperate bid to escape, the remaining six ducks end up in Anaheim and become an NHL team under the ownership of Phil Palmfeather, and so begins their new life as an Ice Hockey team while continuing to fight off the evil Saurians.
As a kid, I liked it because I like Ice Hockey and I like a good action show; looking back I barely remember it and even question why I liked it. It's one of those bizarre sci-fi furry shows made popular by the likes of Bucky O'Hare and Starfox but the difference here is that Disney wasn't exactly discrete about the fact that this was a marketing cartoon for their Ice Hockey team, which I remind you didn't actually win any trophies until after Disney sold them.
Also it doesn't do much to evolve beyond it's formula, tell me if you've heard these characters before.
Wildwing Flashblade: Brave Leader, defined by an iconic item. (Hockey Mask)
Nosedive Flashblade: Impulsive, immature youngest member.
Duke L'Orange: Reformed thief who will likely by the first to betray the team.
Mallory McMallard: Tomboy, fiery redhead, tough girl.
Tanya Vanderflock: Genius, tech character.
Check "Grin" Hardwing: Gentle giant.

Mind you the villains aren't much better.
Lord Dragaunus: Typical power hungry villain, voiced by Tim Curry for good measure
Siege: Typical muscle bound number two
Chameleon: A creepy little villain with an annoying laugh
Wraith: The wisest one who more often than not speaks with the most common sense

Yeah breaking the mold is hardly this cartoon's strong point but if not for the actual Mighty Ducks franchise of bad movies and okay Ice Hockey team at the time then the Mighty Ducks may have been viewed more favorably. But sadly it wasn't a success nor as well remembered as the likes of Gargoyles and signaled the end of what was a decent run of TV cartoons for the Disney Channel.