Alright.
Since we're being real, here, I'm gonna go public with what I have to say regarding this "outbreak".
IN ADVANCE-I'm having a really bad day (I'm on Spring Break and I'm having a bad day...That means a lot) so if I accidentally hurt anybody's feelings or show some sort of aggression towards anyone, that is NOT what I'm trying to do at all.
I'm just here to say what I have to say.
Back to reality for a moment.
PGR...I don't even know how to describe it. I've only been a member for maybe a month or two now. It's still taking me a minute to adjust and al. I think the story (plot) change is EPIC and the characters are very creative.
But with this whole feud thing...It's really complicating the feeling I get by being in a big RP like this.
Honestly, the only thing I do on this website is comment, bitch and whine about my problems, and attempt to write my stories that eventually get screwed over by this wretched laptop of mine!!
Nevertheless, I come here to escape the bitterness of reality. Now its starting to feel like home here.
And since we're all taking off the gloves/shades (figuratively, not in a violent sense) about ourselves, I'm gonna tell y'all something.
When I said that "it feels like home"...I'm not joking.
I experience A LOT of negative comments from people in my family. There's a lot of drama almost every week, things in the past have happened that I am not proud of...And I'm almost 15! It's just too much.
One person is constantly telling me how I'm pathetic, how I have no friends, and how I need to get out more...I stay up in my room and get on this laptop to forget about stuff like that.
That's why I'm not keeping my mouth shut. I've ALWAYS kept my mouth shut about things that involve my actual life, which sucks alot; so there's no way that I'd just sit idly by and watch something else like this happen in front of me. It's almost as if this whole World is crumbling before me and I can't stand it!
But back to this topic.
The only think that I can stand up behind with absolute certainty is that I've seen the joke that N posted. At first, I half-believed it...When I heard the subjects behind it, I was like "Wow, that sucks. I hope y'all get the help you need."
A day later I find out its a joke...I look back and go...Oooh, that's messed up.
Personally, I have made jokes like that, some even worse than that, I won't lie! But since I know that it wasn't meant to target anyone with experience behind these issues, I let it go...Water under the bridge. *Snaps* Just like that.
I don't know if anyone in this "club" (I don't know what to call it, 'club' just doesn't sound right to me) has had experience with issues such as those...I personally haven't, but that doesn't mean that I'll just joke around like its no big deal. It is! But we've established that with N and she said she was sorry. What more do ya want?
I already know of a person who said that they are leaving...And I don't want that to happen.
It's a really unnecessary casualty. All over a joke!? I'm not saying that anyone is right or wrong, I'm just stating what I agree and disagree with.
If you want to leave and there's no way to convince you. Hey, it is what it is. I might not like it, but I'll respect your decision. However, bullying, which I have ALOT of experience with...I don't see it here. I'm not saying that it doesn't exist, because then I'd be playing devils advocate. If it is bullying, which I HAVE NOT PERSONALLY SEEN, I'm sure we can fix this in a rational fashion without further casualty.
Dictatorship? I don't see much of either. I don't have a problem with HAVING to read all of every post, no matter how long it is or if it has nothing to do with you. I think its the same thing as supporting teammates on a baseball team or something like that. At least that's how I see it.
Frankly, there are some posts that I haven't fully read, but I eventually read all of them.
Nobody is saying that you had to read every single word in one sitting, 'cuz I just read a couple paragraphs at a time until I read it all.
I don't know how that'll work for y'all...Take a notepad and write it out or just read it and memorize it.
I don't know if anyone has a problem with it, I just hear it come up a lot.
Revolution against leaders?
I'm not in the loop about it. I don't think that there should be any immediate removal from Leaderboard. But then again, I've only been here for a month, tops.
That's a really bold move, but I don't think it calls for all of the tension. I think people just need to express their opinion without fear of being kicked off or being hated for it. I just have an intuition that that could be the case.
Still, I'm not taking sides, I'm just saying.
Also; I know that a lot of people were really "off-put" by N's joke, and I get that...But seriously, we've all made mistakes, she's apologized, so what else do you want done? Do you want her to take off the post? Say sorry individually? What?!
If you want to leave BECAUSE of the joke, or anything else regarding N or any other leaders...Hey, that's your decision, but I think that's a really messed up thing to do.
We all have to deal with peoples' quirks. Both in real life and on here, and if you can't handle it...I don't have a problem with you leaving. But I don't think that people should abandon PGR over a joke.
People say that its a bigger concept than the joke and its been brewing before I got here...I don't really care about what happened before!
This may sound selfish, but I really feel hurt since this world could almost be shut down right after I got here due to something that I have not been involved with...It really does suck.
On another note...I honestly thought (I'm not being dramatic here) that this happened because I signed up. For some reason I've always been followed by this Dark Cloud of bad luck that just screws up a lot of stuff. It doesn't normally affect me, directly, but it gets other people involved.
That's just something that I've almost never been able to escape, its always been like that with me.
I AM NOT trying to use sorrow and pity to get my way and convince people to go my way, I'm just stating the truth.
I'm just sharing the truth about me and my personal life.
I think that's all I really need to say.
Also, I agree with Eneko and N about the whole 'break' thing, but since we're all posting these speeches and whatnot, it kinda defeats the purpose.
Nevertheless, I agree that we all need to just chill out and put our arms down before more casualties are caused.
For those who can't let the joke slide...I get what you're saying, but I REALLY want to just get this whole thing behind us.
I don't think anyone is mad about the JOKE specifically (to the point of leaving or getting pissed off), but just other qualities about a person they don't like. I think that is worse since nobody has spoken up about it.
We're all mature here, we don't have to threaten each-other with leaving the RP over something that can be settled really easy.
A lot of tensions here are rising, and that is something that I really can't handle right now.
I hope my words touched you all, I just had to get that off of my mind before stuff got worse.
-TDE
Any disagreements, arguments, comments, positive or negative, feel free to lay 'em out right here.
Speak now or forever hold your peace.
I've learned something about big problems such as this:
The truth will set you free, and bottling it up will slowly devour you from the inside-out.
I don't judge, and I don't have any Leader position:
Like *almost* always, I'm just a bystander.
