Please keep in mind that this is my FIRST post here. I have been actually wanting to write a little something here for quite some time and thought I should sit down at my desk and kind of talk about some of my thoughts and why I feel like it is HARD to belong to one single religion or why I don't really feel accepted by any one religion. Does that even make sense?
Let me make one thing perfectly clear, I do believe that Jesus died on the cross to forgive our sins. I believe that he loves every single one of us no matter what. I don't believe that it is a "sin to be LGBT" or whatever the hell people go on about these days. I guess what I am trying to say is I have a hard time finding my spirituality because of this prejudice and hatred towards people like me who aren't "straight" or what have you. I don't have any interest in men because of trauma that has happened in my past. Am I saying all men are bad? Absolutely not. However I just can't see myself with one. But that is my personal business. I am just using this as an example.
Back to religion and my struggle with it. I do pray, and I like to believe there is a higher being above us. However I don't like to completely disregard science either because there is truth to both sides of the coin. In my mind I wish religion and science would work together because they both help each other out in a way. I don't know, not going to start a religion verse science debate. That is not the point of this post whatsoever.
My struggle begins with me feeling out of place at church. Please keep in mind I haven't been to church for some odd years. Every time I want to go to a new church, I feel something holding me back. So I wonder what is keeping me from going? God loves all of his people no matter what. It is man/humans with the prejudice and hate against people that differ from them or lead a lifestyle that they don't agree with. I guess I fall into that "lifestyle most don't agree with" and I feel if I enter a church I would be out of place. But it goes a little deeper than that.
It really started when I was with my mom and I find myself being drawn toward the wonder of witchcraft. I am intrigued by the fact that they regard nature and the earth so highly. They see beauty in ALL living creatures and animals, no matter what walk of life. I am curious, can I find my own witchly path? Can I find a way to both believe in Jesus and still follow the ways of Wiccan? That is mainly my question. How does one go about trying to find their spiritual path when they feel like they've been left behind or because of personal trauma pushed deep into remission and closed off from the world spiritually? I am just now starting to feel some sort of spiritual self awaken again. Like part of me is coming back. Basically can anybody here help guide me? That is all I ask.
Thank you for taking the time to read this if you did. Just wanted to get this off my chest for it has been bothering me for sometime. Advice and counsel would be much appreciated.
