HI there I'm Cynthia
I won't really have some specific thing to post about
I'm really just going to use this as a blog.
I'll probably have random updates of the most amazing thing thats happened
or an update about the worst thing thats happened.
I like comments. I like reading them.

Subtext

I like stories and blogs that require me to do extra work in understand it, as in deciphering. It makes you think even more, possibly deeper about a topic, or it can dissuade someone completely from reading it. Well I love them. The ones I do understand anyways.

It's so weird how a phrase can trigger such emotion
that it's almost like a handicap.
It almost makes you feel helpless and isolated, it brings truth to your eyes
that you are probably the only one that functions this way
your the only one with this point of view.
People seem shallow and ignorant.
Its hard to try and agree with them, or even try to see yourself becoming more than acquaintances because you hold different view points.
But it all comes down to effort.
If one doesn't put effort into supplying a plant with resources such as heat, light, and water, it will wilt and die.
Nothing will foster from it.
The same goes for friendship.
You can't build it without the sunlight and water.
I often find myself taking a step back and examining whats in front of me.
The way things work, how people act, how they act differently with others.
You see their true colors, you can tell when they use "their people voice" you can tell when they feel awkward, or lonely, or angry.
I thrust things when I'm angry. It doesn't appear to make that much of a deal."Oh she doesn't know her own strength!"
Its possibly the only time they see emotion from you except for that one time...
You ponder at times if you should talk to that certain someone...that back up plan who you know is there but you don't want to use it.
It's the final lifeline. You know if you use it, it means you've got nothing else and you don't want it to be that way.
You convince yourself and it somehow appears that things are going well but they take sharp turns, and if your not too careful you might hit the curb.
But what if the passenger is distracting you when you hit the curb? Is it your fault then?

Ponder that.
Or maybe it's just meant to be.

You'll be okay.

Nah that title doesn't represent my mood thats the song I'm listening to by rediscover. Ha love them.

So I'm kinda boredd! I submitted wallpapers for the first time in a long time! Glad to see I haven't entirely lost my touch on making wallpapers. Now I need a new idea on my next wallpaper to make.

OH yea I wanted to complain about how busy I am not mostly because of this paper I had to write for social just a 3-5 page paper but it isn't so bad I'm on page 3 right now and i'm enjoying writing it. And now I have 3 drawings to do and a self portrait to do in PASTELS! I'd like to just point out that Drawing is not my forte and I've never used pastels in my life but hey I need some variety in my portfolio so I'm going to act like I've done this my whole life for these two weeks. It's for my college portfolio that I will be submitting soon.

I actually did this drawing of my hand in my flute position which was very complex and had a lot of depth to it, and it didn't come out crappy at all! I was proud of it and it was my first time ever drawing a hand! I guess I'm not such loser at drawing lol. I shall upload it on myo when I finish drawing and you WILL be amazed at my transformation!

The other thing I'm going to draw are eggs the shading is what will mostly be what I'm trying to present out of it. I hope I get into my number one school that would be just fabulous. I just don't want to do college work. I hate having butt loads of work to do because than I get stressed about it and work on the same thing for four hours going no where.

Anyways the weekend is almost here horraayy!
I'm supposed to be donating blood next week. What have I done? I wonder if I'll be eligible this time. Your supposed to be 110 pounds. My weight changes a lot between 100-110 pounds everyday so hopefully I'll be 110 on that day. And hopefully i'm not anemic and I have enough blood because I have the universal blood donor type. Yes that's right I'm an O, you know you want it.

But that's all thats going on with me basically OH MY GOD and Naruto shippuuden episodes are on DISNEY! they have them coming on wednesday at like 8 or something? THAT'S SO FREAKINg awesome and even more awesome I have hd tv and I can record it! but i'm tv illiterate so I still don't know how to really use my new tv.

Dang this post is long! When did I start posting like Angel? lol.

Have a fabbb weekend.

Become the worst night.

My tears are full of anger and sadness and they slowly slide down and burn my cheeks.

Cancellations, rejection and loneliness have done this to me yet again.

I was actually looking forward to this night but now it's completely ruined.
Theres no party anymore I'm surprised I was actually going to go, I was actually invited for once.
My friend is ditching me again to be with his girlfriend.
Everyone else has plans and I don't know them.
I thought things would get better since I'm going to a concert tomorrow.
but no those are getting fucked up too.
The girl I'm going with probably can't go since her grades.
I asked the other people I know who are going and asked if I could chill with them.
But probably not since they will be in a VIP section which means sorry theres no room for you.
It stinks.
I'm tired of having to revert back to these feelings.
They always come back and find me.

So I'll hold my chin up high and act like I'm having the time of my life.
I'll walk down the street with my costume on, proud of the work I made.

I've been gone now i'm back.

I've been gone for a while verry busy and tired.
It's 12AM Way too late I should be sleeping.
I finally submitted a new piece of work but it's having problems it says it was made in 99 the glitch thing always happens to my work.
So I have to resubmit it and hope that it works this time.
Here it is

ODD thing it all the animes I've been watching so far has couple with orange hair!
Lovely Complex
Skip beat
Bokura ga Ita

ALL orange hair. Whats up with that?

Anyways. I'm going to try and submit some new workk real soon but I have an application to start on and some drawings that need to be drawn for my portfolio so it will be a while.

Have a happy safe Halloween!

In the car

I'm sitting in the car right now with my laptop. I really love my laptop. I STILL have like perfect connection outside of my house with my laptop. I'm going to vermont. WOOO 15 hour drive! How fun that's going to be. Well I'll try and update later sometimes sorry if I don't comment cause I'm going to be realllyy busy from now on. I'm also watching Lovely Complex it's pretty good!