I hate my feelings. I can get so mad, but then regret it later on. I hate being mad and I really do my best to try and not be. But it's like, if you're gonna rub me the wrong way, what are you expecting from me? To just take it? Yeah, I used to because I was a bitch, but now it's like I'm not up for that shit anymore... I just want this bullshit to end... I just wanna go back to how things were before it got super heated... I really just want everything to stop... I hate this... I hate it so much. Fuck, even during my previous post my gut felt so twisted while typing that because I know I wouldn't normally go on a tangent like that... I hate all that's been going on so fucking much... sometimes I just feel that things would be better if I just stopped existing, you know? I wanna say sorry, but really don't know if I would actually be sorry this time... that's just something I'd have to think about...
I just seem to piss people off and I'm not even trying to start anything! I can't even say anything without someone jumping down my throat with their dick hanging out... and no it's not just my ex, even a few friends on Xbox got on me because apparently I wanted to express an opinion. 2016 never left, it just changed fucking numbers. Everyone still gets offended over the slightest of things and has to just get so damn anal... Granted, I know we're only twelve days in the new year, but it's like fuck man. People that usually never got offended by anything are now getting offended by everything and, again, I'm not just talking about my ex. You can't say shit without someone just getting on you these days... I might as well just go back to being quiet and not communicate anymore. Seems like it was a horrible idea to have come out of my shell... I hate everything about 2016... I hate my fucking feelings... if I could go back and shoot myself, I would. Even though that's still a very plausible thing to do since I am right here with myself after all...
Fuck it...
The only thing that was good about 2016 was actually living with my ex. Not my first ex, she could die in a fire for all I care and her stupid ass whipped husband who apparently might still have beef with me. But yeah living with my ex was definitely the best thing to have happened last year. Not really much the fighting, but honestly what fucking relationship doesn't fight? I wish it worked better though. I've known people who fought worse than we did and are still together. It all just fucking sucks...
