Not bad! There were a few grammar errors, and some of the punctuation is off. Aside from those sort of technical things, I like how you have the characters. I think more should have been added to bring out their personalities, but this is a fairly short piece.

After reading this I'm almost positive I'll be drawing Sapphire for you as your prize. I was leaning more towards drawing her anyway. I'm not too good at sexy poses, and women are difficult enough to draw as it is.