Glad to see you liked it. ^^ The hazel orbs of hate was a description that I was iffy on, so I'm happy to see you mentioning it. That made up my mind for me in regards to keeping it in. I'm also glad that working the ideas in without actually using the items fits your challenge as well. You should write more challenges after this one, for writing With a Luke Skywalker Cutout was surprisingly easy. I might start taking requests. Maybe.
I think you did a good job with the challenge, and you surprised me with it as well.
The pacing is energetic and consistent throughout the piece, makes reading it through very easy.
"...hazel orbs of hate."
That vivid description caught my eye, had to mention it.
Working some items into the story without using them in the literal sense is is good to see. The spider plant scene is especially amusing to me in that regard.
KoInu kyan
Title: Senior Otaku | Posted 07/23/08 | Reply
Wow...that's all I can really say.
I really need to work on my writing...
BASH
Title: Otakuite++ | Posted 06/10/08 | Reply
@CosmicSailor:
Glad to see you liked it. ^^ The hazel orbs of hate was a description that I was iffy on, so I'm happy to see you mentioning it. That made up my mind for me in regards to keeping it in. I'm also glad that working the ideas in without actually using the items fits your challenge as well. You should write more challenges after this one, for writing With a Luke Skywalker Cutout was surprisingly easy. I might start taking requests. Maybe.
Anyway, once more, glad you liked it.
See ya, or not!
CosmicSailor
Title: Otaku Legend | Posted 06/10/08 | Reply
I think you did a good job with the challenge, and you surprised me with it as well.
The pacing is energetic and consistent throughout the piece, makes reading it through very easy.
"...hazel orbs of hate."
That vivid description caught my eye, had to mention it.
Working some items into the story without using them in the literal sense is is good to see. The spider plant scene is especially amusing to me in that regard.
Once again, very well done.