No Holding Back
K. For once, didn't do a card with gothic art. I love CUL. :)
Anyway, behind the meaning of this card has something to do with what I realized I should stop doing and then start doing. This wasn't long ago when I realized...but if I want to be truly happy...I must have No Shame, fear, and no holding myself back.
So far, ever since I came to that realization I have felt more free, my days seem...brighter then usual....and I feel like laughing and smiling out of the blue. I feel great.
Now, I notice that if I myself aren't completely happy...well, I feel caged in a prison inside myself. I think I've been holding myself back, both online and offline. I want no worries if I annoy people, cause most are practically complete strangers to me...And we're gonna annoy someone in our lives, fact of life. So it's not worth the time if it's not someone you're close to. And I've been hesitating to fully show all of myself.
Though I doubt most notice...But mentally I just now stopped holding myself back. I dunno what on earth happened...But this happened not long ago...Must've been the snow days...and martial arts pays off.
I've been thinking that...if you aren't one of the people I'm closer to then most...then why the hell should I care?
I hesitate and be careful of my words. And it irks me. So ever since I've come to this...I realized that I feel like I can get things done.
Now, I'm not slow...I'm not stupid...And I'm not an air head...
I'm young, not naive at all and I already have come to realizations with things most of people my age around me have yet to realize and don't even think about much. I'm just young and still have realizations in me and am still learning. I'm just young. And I'm probably one of the most deep thinkers you'll probably encounter...I think of stuff while not knowing I'm thinking of stuff. I didn't even notice when I came to this realization. My mind goes on autopilot half the time. The most eccentric part of me is my mind and the way I view and think on things...
You wanna act smart about this...just don't even try. Cause it really ain't worth effort to argue.
I shalt not fear of my actions and true self, I shalt not feel shame of myself, and I shalt not hold my whole being back~
So anyways...I'm quite proud.
Font's called 28 Days Later...Which if I'm not mistaken...is a zombie movie as well...I still need to see that...>.>;